Wow, they’re not even trying to make them look cute anymore. The Japanese born ROBOTOPS is a construction robot whose name is spelled in all caps because IT MEANS BUSINESS. The killing business. The four-legged, two-armed robot is actually a kind of automated mobile crane with 29 functioning joints for picking off humans, and of course the occasional piece of construction material. Using a high quality three-chip CCD camera, the robot can be operated remotely for particularly dangerous jobs. And no, I didn’t alter that quote at all. Finally, people are starting to get the picture. It’s comforting to know I’m not the only one that sees a problem here. Seriously, Japan — you know I love you (manga, sushi, worn panty vending machines), but this shit has got to stop. Because if not, well, Godzilla . Just sayin’, we share a special bond (read: intercourse). Japanese construction firm unleashes insectoid robot crane on humanity [dvice] Thanks to cougar78, Aaron and John, who know the only good robots are the little guys from Batteries Not Included . Am I right? No, that was a test and you all failed.

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No, No, No: Japanese Killer Construction Bot

China. They all seem to come from China. And let me tell you something: I’m sure as hell not eating the cat food there. A kitty in Chongqing, China, is getting some extra-special attention these days: The furry feline has developed wings! Though born looking completely normal, once the cat hit the age of 1, he began growing wing-shaped appendages on either side of his spine. According to the Telegraph’s report, scientists believe the appendages developed due to grooming habits, a genetic defect or a hereditary skin condition. Nice one, scientists. How about you just admit you have no effing clue. That said, I change my mind about not eating Chinese cat food (zing, local Chinese restaurant). I’m gonna grow wings! Climb aboard ladies, I’ll take you places no other woman has ever been. The moon! My bedroom . Washed the dinosaur sheets just for you baby. Also, I have a mini-fridge. With snacks. Cat in China grows a pair of wings [msnbc] Thanks to Sharkey and Paul, who are holding out for flying dogs like that funky bitch Falcore the Luck Dragon from The Neverending Story .

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Where Are These Flying Cats Coming From?

German artist Simon Schubert folds pieces of paper into beautiful pictures of, uh, stairwells. Each piece takes about a week’s worth of work and can sell for up to $6,000. *gathering neighborhood kids in a wagon* Arts and crafts time at the Geekologie Writer’s house! “Most of the people who see the work are surprised that the pictures are created by folding paper, they don’t believe it when I tell them. “Many of them think I’ve used paint or pencil to create the affect of light and shade. But when they realise the pictures are actually folded they are quite impressed.” Impressive, Simon, it’s too bad I’m about to flood the market with child-folded ripoffs! Isn’t that right, kids? Kids? *dink dink dittle dee dink dittle dee dink dee dink dee dink * DAMN YOU, ICE CREAM VAN! Hit the fold for a bunch more.

Link:
Artist Folds Paper To Create Pictures

This video is like two years old so if you’ve seen it, congratulations, free Geekologie bumper sticker. Just leave an ‘OLD’ and your bank account info in the comments and I’ll have it transferred in first thing Monday. Anyway, did you know that in an emergency situation you can drink the juice out of elephant shit? No, because you’d rather die . And I’d imagine puking afterward would probably end up doing more harm than good. But Bear Grylls is all man. Also, I love how a piece of shit almost falls in his mouth at 0:34, classic. Youtube Thanks to Tim, who tried it with baby shit and *HORF*

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Bear Grylls Drinks Elephant Dung Juice

Apparently some guy was huffing pinecones when he accidentally snorted a bud into his lungs , where it grew into a little tree . Please note: man was not actually snorting pinecones, I just made that up for the sake of providing you with the highest quality investigative journalism. Also, I don’t know know if you could tell or not, but I made that graphic using Photoshop. Elite skills: I’m full of them. But hopefully, not evergreens . Artyom Sidorkin, came to a hospital in the city of Izhevsk in Central Russia last week, complaining that he was experiencing chest pain and coughing up blood. After submitting to an X-ray the doctors saw a lump in the patient’s lung. After a biopsying the lump the doctors pulled out a 5 centimeter fir tree branch out of his lung, complete with needles. Sick! At least he didn’t swallow it though. Because one time I swallowed a pumpkin seed and then several months later pissed a jack-o-lantern, complete with cut-out face and candle. Boy did I feel 8 pounds lighter! Hit the jump for a graphic shot of the tree and partial lung after removal. NOT recommended for lunch viewing.

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Gross!: Man Grows Small Fir Tree In Lung