Seen here shaming their families, Cringey McVista and the Windhoes 98 crew or whatever rap about their love for the Windows 7 phone . It’s…pretty much as bad as it gets. It’s the kind of video that, not only do you find yourself embarrassed to watch and feel bad for the girls, but you start wondering how they’re gonna wake up tomorrow and be able to live with themselves. Not very easily, I know that (I’ve done way worse). Hit the jump for the even you could do better (and I almost never say that).

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Painful: Girls Rapping About Windows Phone

Unarguably the best screencap of all time. This is a video of some superheroes (and a villain) dancing at a kid’s birthday party. It…gets interesting fast. One minute they’re all singing happy birthday and the next booties are poppin’ and crotches rockin’. Obviously, they can expect a call as my birthday nears. Hit the jump for this year’s must-have birthday performers.

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Superheroes Dancing Dirty At Kid’s Birthday Party

This is a video of some nutjob starting a fire in his mouth using some sort of magic powder. Then, after he gets it going, some other dude uses it to light a cigarette and musters the best “I’m cool” look he can FOR A GUY WHO JUST LIT A CIGARETTE FROM ANOTHER DUDE’S BURNING MOUTH. That doesn’t make you cool, bro. Now flamethrowing nips — THOSE would make you cool. And me hot. Get it?! Because you melted my face off when I went in for a motorboat! Hit the jump for the WTF’ery in action.

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Why You Do That?: Guy Starts A Fire In His Mouth

Cats : they’re supposed to stand on all four feet. Granted sometimes they’ll sit on three with a back one in the air and lick their genitals in front of company, but that’s because they’re terrible hosts. Dammit Archimedes — at least set out the hors d’ oeuvres first! Recently, there have been sightings of bipedal Frankenfelines , and this is another. Except this guy doesn’t actually go anywhere, he just stands there . It’s like how they teach you if you’re ever surrounded by hyenas you’re supposed to hold your hands above your head so they think you’re too tall to f*** with. What? I was raised in the bush . Just kidding, but I did work in a Lowe’s home & garden department one summer. Hit the jump for the OH HELLLLLLLL NO, YOU GET DOWN FROM THERE THIS INSTANCE! (instance is the new instant fyi)

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Get Down From There!: Devil Cat Learns To Stand

A video of robots struttin’ their asses to the Bee Gee’s classic, ‘Stayin’ Alive’? Of course. This IS the internet , people. Hit the jump for the video.

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Boston Dynamic’s PETMAN And Big Dog Strutting To The Bee Gee’s ‘Stayin’ Alive’

This is a video of a kid’s mom refusing to buy him more Pokemon cards at Toys R Us, and the kid losing his Pokemind in the middle of the store. At first I thought it was fake because why would you be film yourself talking at the checkout of a toy store , then I realized the kid had already started his downward spiral into hysteria BEFORE the film started rolling. Now I’m not saying if I were that kid’s mother I’d have breasts I would’ve made him walk home, because that’s how you get your kids abducted. No, I would have tied a rope around his waist and made him tow the car home. That way I could keep an eye on him. *tapping head* Always thinking, this one. Hit the jump for the wrap it up public service announcement.

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Pokemon Card Freakout At Toys R Us, Kid Throws Snorlax-Sized Hissy Fit

This is a parody of an Epic Meal Time episode in the World of Warcraft . They did a pretty good job. Plus at the end there’s a chick with cotton candy hair eating something while making faces. That part was confusing. Actually, it was all confusing. Not gonna lie folks, I’m not very smart. SIKE! I got an 84 on my IQ test — that’s a solid B! *raising the roof* “The test goes to 180 — that’s not very high.” Oh man, I was though . I told them my name was Batman and ate two pencil erasers. Hit the jump for the video.

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World Of Warcraft ‘Epic Meal Time’ Parody

That…is making my eyes water. This is an 18-minute trip (literally, some of the graphics are INTENSE) down Mario memory lane featuring a musical montage of tunes from Nintendo games featuring everyone’s favorite plumber (unless your favorite plumber is the guy from Roto-Rooter you call when your shitter overflows, in which case no, not him). It includes music from pretty much every game Mario has ever been in and makes a great soundtrack for the day. Kidding, it’s like having a 18-minute seizure. Hit the jump, watch a little, then hopefully get sent home early for looking sickly.

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Mario 30th Anniversary Music Extravaganza!

Ever wanted to watch a time-lapse animation of tape hanging from a glass plate unravel all creepy freaky-deaky like? Of course you have — you’re sick in the head. Per (non-sandwich) artist Johan Rijpma: …I worked on this project for about 6 months. I tried many different compositions and then made a selection. A single composition could take more than 12 hours to develop/breakdown. (the spinning of the plate was done by hand, turnin the plate about 0,4 degree’s every 30 seconds, this meant i was standing in the wind and the rain for hours watching the tape “grow” and watching the sun come up/go down) Impressive, but you know what I’ve always wanted to watch? Grass grow . Like, really take the time and acid and just watch it . Kidding, but one time I did lay down a blanket at the park and try to spot dinosaurs in the clouds. It sucked, this sweet-ass velociraptor was just starting to form when a giant pig head came out of nowhere and swallowed it up. RUINED MY ENTIRE PICNIC. That and the ants. Did I mention there were ants? Apparently I laid down on top of an ant hill. And let me tell you — those lil dicks were all about some of my homemade potato salad. Plus biting my legs. I’ve hated all outdoors ever since. I don’t even open my apartment windows anymore, it’s that bad. One time a friend asked me to go for a walk to talk because his girlfriend had broken up with him and I told him to get over it and she was way out of his league anyways just so I wouldn’t have to go. Hit the jump for the video.

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Freaky Deaky ‘Tape Unraveling’ Time-Lapse

This is a video from Cornell University of two artificial intelligence systems talking to each other. They’re nonsensical and rude, even to their own kind. Plus they pronounce Cleverbot “Cleverbutt”, which gave me a serious case of the giggles. And by giggles I mean runs, because God decided to play a trick on me and make my coccyx my funny bone. *shakes fist at heaven clenching buttcheeks* Hit the jump for a solid minute of WTF.

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WTF WAS THAT?: Two Artificial Intelligence ‘Cleverbots’ Having A Rude Conversation