Motorcycles : you don’t want to fall off one. But if you do you want to be well protected. Also, riding on pillows. Enter UD Replica’s (of Dark Knight and Iron Man 2 leathers fame) Storm Trooper Motorcycle Suits. They’re leather, make you look like a Storm Trooper riding a speeder bike Suzuki, and will cost $1,100 when they come out next year. Also costing $1,100 when they come out next year? The shots I’m gonna sell to the tabloids of my first born child. “And why would they buy those?” Because it’s gonna be Santa’s. Hit the jump for closeups as well as some X-Men and Daredevil leathers that are also available.

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Darth’s Angels: Stormtrooper Motorcycle Leathers

13 exotic sports cars and a Prius were involved in a pileup in Japan over the weekend, with damages to the vehicles estimated as high as $4-million. And that’s not including the Prius. Those things are exorbitant! Also, absorbent (I’ve wiped with one before when they ran out of TP at a music festival). But local authorities say it likely wasn’t a case of “The Fast and the Furious.” Although the investigation is continuing, based on initial interviews, the type of the damage the vehicles suffered and injuries, authorities said they don’t believe the cars were burning rubber as per the highway throwdowns made famous in the street racer movie series. Instead, wet road conditions may have caused the first car, a Ferrari driven by a 60-year-old male, to slip on the two-lane highway and smash into a guard rail. Cars behind then added to the pile-up as they tried to screech on the brakes. Man that sucks. Here I am with ZERO Ferraris and there are people out there crashing eight of them at a time. It ain’t right! I mean, I deserve a sports car. “You don’t even have a license.” Exactly, so I’ll never crash it. “Or drive.” You’re right — flight simulator it is. Hit the jump for several more shots and a news video of the carnage.

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Car Crash In Japan Claims 8 Ferraris, 3 Mercedes, A Lamborghini Diablo, Nissan GT-R And A Prius

This is Traxxas’ new 1/7-scale electric XO-1, the first ready-to-run (no assembly required) R/C car capable of doing a real (not scale) 100MPH fresh out of the box . But you’re gonna need an actual raceway to drive the thing, because a Wal-Mart parking lot isn’t gonna cut it at 100MPH. The speed demon goes 0-60 in 2.3 seconds and 100 in 4.92. That’s…pretty fast . So fast you probably won’t even see it hit the wall. It costs $1,100 and requires an iPhone or iPod Touch to plug into the controller to unlock its 100MPH potential and provide a real-time tuning/data-tracking utility. Oh man, all this R/C car talk is really taking me back. My brother Frank and I used to build them from kits growing up. His were always turned out badass, but mine…mine never seemed to work. “Because you’re an idiot.” My brother Frank, ladies and gentlemen! Hit the jump for a video of the thing being demoed on an actual racetrack.

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R/C Car Does 100MPH Right Out Of The Box

Nintendo teamed up with West Coast Customs to make two real-life Mario Karts for display at the Los Angeles Auto Show. This is Mario’s classic kart here but there’s a Luigi bee-mobile or whatever after the jump. Both are impressive and I’d pay upwards of $12 for the opportunity to drive one. “Why $12?” Because that’s how much admission to the show costs . I’m gonna steal one and drive it home on the freeway! *peels out going wrong way, gets red-shelled by the po-po* Hit the jump for a couple closeups and the other car, as well as a link to Autoblog’s coverage with even more shots.

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Nintendo x West Coast Customs Make IRL Mario Karts

Inb4 “that looks like a [name some animal]’s penis”. This is a video demonstration of Norway’s new Naval Strike (Magic) Missile. The shakiness made me kinda woozy, but it’s worth checking out if you’ve got the stomach . Me? I’ve got that B-U-T-T-Z. *booty poppin’* The video follows a missile from launch as it flies just over the tops of waves, over an island, and finally through a ship. I’m not sure if civilians are going to be allowed to buy them. The testing for this next-generation anti-ship missile took place off Point Mugu, California in June of this year. According to Konsgberg, the NSM had only 1.5 seconds to acquire and positively ID the ship as its target before striking. The state-of-the-art missile weighs about 400 kg (880 lb) and has a range of 100 nautical miles, both along the coast and in the open ocean. It uses GPS, inertial and terrain reference systems to maintain its bearings. Being a cruise missile, and the only fifth-generation long range precision strike missile in existence, the NSM is capable of flying over land while avoiding obstacles and skimming just above the surface of the ocean to avoid radar detection. The NSM will also make a random high-G-force maneuver in order to confound enemy countermeasures just before it strikes with a 125 kg multi-purpose blast/fragmentation warhead. Hello — Norwegian Navy? This is General Gee Kologie from the US Army’s Antirobotics Division. Huh? What do you mean you’ve never heard of us?! *high-five, hipsters! Jk, jk — don’t touch me* Listen, I need some of these missiles you’ve got. No? Not buying it? What if I told you I’m in middle school and I need one for a science fair project? Hello? HELLO? They hung up on me! “You were talking into a skillet.” I thought it smelled like bacon. Hit the jump for the video. Hit your cubicle-mate for a fight.

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Norway’s New Stealthy Magic Missiles

This is a picture of a luxury car pileup in Monaco. It makes me sad and happy at the same time because 1. it’s always sad to see something beautiful get damaged *eyes own battle-scarred face in mirror* but 2. I have a thing against insanely rich people. “Oh you jelly, GW?” Damn yeah I’m jelly! I’m Smucker’s as a mutherf***er. The wealthy French Riviera city state of Monaco was the scene of a pileup involving five luxury cars with an estimated value of more than $1.1 million. The collision, involving a Bentley Azure (worth an estimated $400,000), a Mercedes S Class ($120,000), a Ferrari F430 ($230,000), an Aston Martin Rapide ($230,000) and a Porsche 911 ($130,000), occurred in front of Monaco’s Place du Casino, according to Sky News. The British TV network reported that the incident began when the Bentley scraped the side of the Mercedes before plowing into the Ferrari. Then, the Bentley proceeded to run into the Aston Martin and the Porsche . Haha! So basically it was all the Bentley driver’s fault. *eying driver in picture* Oh look, it’s…”Don’t do it, GW!” Fine, FINE, but only because I backed through my garage door yesterday. Even the crashes are stylish: Million-dollar wreck in Monaco [msnbc] Thanks to Mr. Fancy, who may or may yes have been driving the Aston Martin.

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Oh You Know, It’s Just A Bentley, Mercedes, Ferrari, Aston Martin & Porsche Car Crash

Mike Duke, who might have the simplest name ever, modded his late-model Mercury Cougar (which I used to own back in 2001 before sliding it off an icy road , wrapping it around a couple trees and winding up in the ICU for 11 days) into a Bugatti Veyron . Basically by fabricating a giant body kit . Now I know what you’re thinking, and it’s true: you almost lost your Geekologie Writer before you even knew him. Petrolhead Mike Duke, 25, spent nine months transforming his Ford Cougar into a red and black imitation of the 1,000bhp motor. A specially-designed bodykit makes it indistinguishable from a 1million Veyron and the interior has been re-styled and covered in leather. But the engine is the Cougar’s standard 2.5 litre V6 model, meaning its power falls well short of the 1,000bhp developed by the Veyron’s 8-litre powerplant. This means 0-62mph in 8.2 seconds and a top speed of 140mph - a way off the Veyron’s 2.5 seconds and 253mph. Why? Why do single men do anything — to trick women into coming home with them. *fumbling around with keys, finally opens door* “This apartment is dingy.” It’s a safehouse baby, I’m hiding out. “Driving that sports car?” I’m a spy, and spy’s drive fancy cars. “Who are you?” Duke, Mike Duke — Her Majesty’s Secret Service Center and Autobody Repair. Hit the jump for several more shots of the in-process and a couple more angles of the finished product PLUS A LINK TO THE EBAY AUCTION WHERE YOU CAN BUY THE THING ($89K) AND LIVE THE DREAM.

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Man Convincingly Mods $2,000 Mercury Cougar Into $2Million Bugatti Veyron Lookalike

I’m dancing, I’m dancing! This video is all over the tubes and I was trying to avoid posting it but now I’m afraid I won’t stop getting the tip unless I do (and probably still will so I really don’t know why I’m doing this besides accidentally drinking decaf this morning). So here it is: a video of a motorcycle crash after which the two bikes intertwine their handlebars and make sweet, sweet circular love. “Yeaaaaaaah, that’s not how motorcycles do it.” Yes it is too. “You don’t know anything about sex, do you?” Yes huh I do! An older kid on the bus said it was like shooting fireworks out of your pecker. “And you believed him?!” Would I have sprayed my pubes with flame-retardant if I didn’t? “That’s hairspray.” I’m rockin’ a new ‘do! Hit the jump for the have seen video.

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Motorcycle Crash And Subsequent Bike Dance

Seen here looking suspiciously like some sort of Pagan sun talisman, a shock-wave generator may prove to be the future of engines, pushing traditional internal-combustion joints to the wayside. Ooooooor being all bullshit. Oooooor having its patent rights bought up by engine manufacturers and buried. Not unlike what happened to hovercars. F*** you, Michelin Man! The generator is about the size of a saucepot, and would replace the 1,000-pound power train in most cars — no transmission, cooling system, emissions regulation or fluids needed. It consists of a rotor carved with wave-like channels. Fuel and air enter through central inlets, and the rotor spins to block their exit through a separate outlet. The sudden build-up of pressure generates a shock wave, compressing the mixture. Then it’s ignited, and as the rotor keeps spinning, the outlet opens again to let the hot gases escape. The novel generator would use about 60 percent of fuel for propulsion, according to MSU. This is a dramatic improvement over typical car engines, which use only 15 percent of fuel for forward movement. The system could also make cars 20 percent lighter, improving fuel economy even more. Well damn, what can’t it do?! “Actually exist”. Touch, my skeptical friend. “I’m not your friend.” You can say that again, dick! Shockwave-Generating Wave Discs Could Replace Internal Combustion Engines [popsci] Thanks to Score_u_sum_Rod, who — oh gosh, can you really?!

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Shockwave Generator: Engine Of The Future

Seen here demonstrating how Power Wheels are made, this is the The Shadow Hawk Street Hawk: coming soon to my driveway elevator garage . Okay maybe not. But only because I could never part with the Tercel. The Street Hawk is the first vehicle with 46 inches of independent wheel travel without camber or caster compromise. The ride height or ground clearance is adjustable from zero to 44 inches while in motion. The Street Hawk has 1,100 horsepower, 1,805 foot pounds of torque and has a highway estimated 22mpg. The vehicle is all-wheel-drive with 40 inch tall, 15.5 inch wide tires and 22 inch wheels. The air suspended seats are hand crafter to the driver’s specific proportions. From the driver’s seat you can control the vehicles pitch, roll and overall ride height using D-pad controls beneath your fingertips. The Street Hawk is the best on-road performing Shadow Hawk. With an overall weight of 4,800 pounds, the Street Hawk can accelerate from 0 to 60mph in 3.5 seconds and has a calculated top speed of 208mph . The vehicle uses an innovative actijavascript:void(0);ve suspension system that leans into corners and maintains the ideal camber and caster geometry throughout operation. Production is set at 12 units per year with the first vehicle available in late 2011. I want one. No, I NEED one. And they start at only $1.2 million. I’m gonna buy all of next year’s production! In my dreams. And speaking of my dreams: I had one last night where I was making out with a werewolf (I blame Twilight ). So yeah, what’s that mean? And, completely unrelated, any idea why my dog’s been hiding under the bed all day? Must be sick. Hit the jump for a bunch more pictures.

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DO WANT: Street Hawk Urban Assault Vehicle