This is a mysterious picture that just cropped up from China featuring a couple Apple fanboys cosplaying as a Mac cyborg and fungal-bearded Steve Jobs . Plus Amelia Earhart is trying to sneak by on the right. One thing’s for certain — this dynamic duo wants to make it clear that they’re number 1. Number 1 at what is anybody’s guess, but I suspect it’s flashing the “we’re number 1″ sign. Oh yeah? Maybe cause you’ve never seen mine! *BOOSH* “That’s three, GW.” I’m working on it! Hit the jump for a full body shot.

Link:
Now That’s A Party: Apple Cyborg/Steve Jobs Cosplay

Ugh, of course they release it right AFTER Christmas. This is a $100 Steve Jobs action figure. The company that’s making it is billing it as ” ultra-realistic ” but I can almost guarantee Steve’s wrists DID NOT look like that in real life. That said, I’d still play with one. “Help, help, my hand just swallowed a pool ball!” Dammit Steve, stop being so dramatic, you’ll be fiiiiiine. Say, what do you think of the dollhouse I made you? “Honestly GW? I really like it.” Ha — I bet I know why. *in unison* “Because there’s no Windows!” LOLOL. Oh Steve, you’re my only friend. Hit the jump for a ton more pictures.

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Finally, A Realistic Steve Jobs Action Figure

As every blog and news site everywhere has already reported ( including Boing Boing ), the definitive biography of the late Steve Jobs, by Walter Isaacson , is out today. Actually, it’s out today in paper , but was released yesterday for download via Amazon and iTunes . I’m willing to bet it breaks some sort of download sales record. Last night’s edition of the CBS news magazine 60 Minutes was devoted entirely, 100%, to stories on Jobs and his products . As Mike Godwin noted on Twitter , Steve Kroft asks during the segment how Jobs, “who dropped LSD and marijuana,” goes off to India and returns to become a businessman. LOL @ “dropping marijuana.” The show sure does know their demo. At least they didn’t say he smoked acid. Snarking aside, the 60 Minutes pieces are worth watching. Here’s part 1 , here’s part 2 , and here’s 3 (!), on iPad apps for autism. In other news this week, Obama says we’re bringing troops home from Iraq, and Qaddafi’s dead. Related : Dan Lyons, former Fake Steve Jobs, on the backlash .

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Steve Jobs bio out early for downloads; "60 Minutes" devotes entire episode to book

Walter Isaacson’s definitive biography of Apple co-founder Steve Jobs is out Monday. All week long, excerpts have been leaking out, with little snippets of the late Apple CEO’s reported thoughts on alternative medicine , Android , Bill Gates, being strategically mean to people , Obama , what apps Obama’s staffers had on their iPads , cancer , teachers’ unions and labor rights, Issey Miyake turtlenecks , the adoptive parents he loved and rebelled against, and the biological parents who gave him up for adoption (whom he is said to have referred to as “sperm and egg donors”). The first real review, by Janet Maslin in the New York Times , is out today. You can read all 630 pages of the book for yourself soon. [ Amazon ].

Link:
The Steve Jobs biography.

Apple has gathered gadget bloggers and tech journalists to unveil an update to the iPhone. Gizmodo , GDGT , and Engadget have boots on the ground and/or liveblogs in the ether (some are covering remotely). Ars Technica and MacWorld liveblogs are down at the time of this blog post. Oh, wait, Gizmodo and GDGT liveblogs are down intermittently too. Geez.

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Exciting Silicon Valley startup to launch new ‘telecommunications’ device

Note: This isn’t the whole thing, click HERE to see the whole kit and kaboodle in full-res. This is an infographic made by Geekologie Reader Edwin Rahr for his company London Creative that’s all about Steve ‘The Apple Juice’ Jobs. Now I know what many of you are thinking, “but who gives a shit about Steve Jobs ?” And the answer, my friend, is take a look in a mirror. “GAAAAHH, WHO’S THAT BEHIND ME?” Haha — the fanboy that’s gonna stab you! OR Now I know what many of you are thinking, “but who gives a shit about Steve Jobs?” And the answer, my friend, is take a look in a mirror. Get it? A lot more people than care about the guy you’re staring at! BU-BU-BU-BURN. OR Now I know what many of you are thinking, “but who gives a shit about Steve Jobs?” And the answer, my friend, is take a look in a mirror. Now turn off the lights, tie your shoes together and spin around three times repeating “Bloody Mary”. “Those were all bad.” Oh I’m aware. *cutting deep with mirror shard* Steve Jobs Infographic [londoncreative] Thanks Edwin, let me know if you ever wanna make one about me and I’ll provide you with some sweet-ass stories that I made up.

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The Apple Juice: A Steve Jobs Infographic

Andy Ihnatko explains what’s going on in the image above , which was snapped and submitted to him by a reader in Taiwan.

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Steve Jobs shills green tea and Sony hardware in Taiwan

Note: This is only a small, unreadable portion of the infographic, click HERE to see the whole thing in stunning 3-D. Fine, FINE — 2-D . This is an infographic all about Apple . I thought it was pretty interesting. And by pretty interesting I mean I would have been just as excited if it were about the fruit. Mmmm, love those things with a little peanut butter . Pears too! Anyway, I didn’t even have to look at the financials (and I probably never will) to know I want a piece of that. A piece of that pie . That Apple pie. See what I did there? “Shamed yourself?” Exactly. Apple By Numbers [techi] Thanks to Brettmucker, who knows four apples a day will not only keep the doctor away, they’ll help attract horses.

Excerpt from:
Give It To Me Straight, How Many To Keep The Doctor Away?: Apple By The Numbers

These are pictures from some couple’s wedding . Whose? Katie and Aaron’s. What’s so special about Katie and Aaron? Their wedding ceremony (link NSFW ) was officiated entirely by iPad . Why? I dunno, maybe they don’t care if it lasts or not. NOW STOP ASKING QUESTIONS. Katie and Aaron got married in the beautiful outdoor setting in Oceanside and can we take a break from the iPad porn and just talk about how AMAZING Katie’s outfit is. She made all of that herself. Geez, what are you, EpisciPadians? Get it?! Like Episcopalians, except you worship Steve Jobs. Don’t eat the Apple, Katie, he’ll kick us out of the garden! Also, don’t ever venture past the tomatoes, I’m growing holy weed back there. Hit the jump for a bunch more pictures from the ceremony, including a MacBook, iPad and iPhone trifecta.

Link:
When Fanboy/Fangirl Unite: An iPad Wedding

Note: Video is after the jump because I already had like six fanboys call me crying last night after the iPhone sniping . It was pathetic. Seen here looking remarkably like John Gosselin taking a pounding in the mangina (and loving it), Tom from Blendtec is back to wreck an iPhone 4 . Will it blend ? Of course it will. But this video has an extra “movie” aspect to it where Tom explains where he got the phone. It sucked and I didn’t watch it. Like, any of it. ” Oh really — then how’d you get the screenshot, GW?” IT’S CALLED MAGIC STUPID. Hit it for the video.

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I Vote Yes: Will It Blend? iPhone 4 Edition