Because humans shouldn’t be the only ones that get to share ultrasound pictures (your baby looks like a bean!) with their friends, somebody created a Facebook-y website for robots where they can share whatever sadness is going on in their pathetic existences. Sounds familiar! Geekologie Writer: No milk for my cereal, FML. Being a robot just got a little bit more sociable, now that droids have their own social network. At MyRobots.com, which launched today, robot owners can sign-up their automatons, create profiles for them - even include a photo and a name - and then leave them to update their own status. This might be a simple temperature reading - or the results of a clever face-recognition algorithm. But while Facebook is often criticised for emphasising the duller aspects of human life (”Bored. When can I go to the pub?” or “I need pizza”) , the exchange of seemingly mundane status updates between robots (”I am overheating and need a rest” or “I am a vacuum cleaner and I am stuck”) could make them a lot smarter. Wait — so Facebook for robots is actually making them smarter but Facebook for humans makes people f***ing retarded? Why do I get the feeling I’m getting the short end of the stick here? “That’s not a stick — it’s a robot peener .” SO COLD. Facebook for robots helps droids get smarter [newscientist] Thanks to Wilmersama, who I’m putting in charge of infiltrating the social network and collecting recon on what kinds of music these f***ers are listening to on Spotify.

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Wonderful: Robots Get Their Own Facebook

According to Facebook , there are only 4.74-degrees of separation between you and any other user on the planet, making our world that much smaller and natural resources that much scarcer. “That’s not how that works.” You shut up! “When considering even the most distant Facebook user in the Siberian tundra or the Peruvian rainforest, a friend of your friend probably knows a friend of their friend,” wrote the Facebook data team in a blog post explaining its research. [The average degrees of separation] used to be six. But thanks to the increasing popularity of social networking, humanity has become more connected over time. Where in 2008 the distance from any one Facebook user was, on average, 5.28 hops, it’s now 4.74, the company’s researchers said. First of all, there’s no such thing as a 0.74 degree of separation. You have to round that up to the next number unless Facebook is counting amputees in which they’re the most insensitive social network in the world. Not that we didn’t already know that . So yeah, there are only FIVE (5!) people separating you and I on Facebook. You know what that means? There are only five people we have to kill before we can be together . I’m gonna wear your skin like a windbreaker! Facebook Claims 4.74 Degrees of Kevin Bacon [foxnews] Thanks to LeftRightLeft, who, despite the name, is actually a terrible marcher. Can skip like nobody’s business though.

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We’re Practically Friends!: Only 4.74 Degrees Of Separation Between You And Any Other Facebooker

Facebook , the social networking giant best known for consistently making its site shittier and more confusing to use, is now home to 140-billion photos , 4% of all photos ever taken . AND WITH ANOTHER 70-BILLION TO BE ADDED THIS YEAR ALONE. I…find that kind of depressing. Like seeing a dead bird on the way to work. Facebook easily dwarfs all other picture-hosting sites, and contains more than 10,000-times the photos in the Library of Congress. Granted most Facebook photos are garbage that nobody wants to see and shouldn’t be remembered anyway, but that’s not my point. My point is this: Myspace . I just uploaded like 400 peener pics to my old profile. COME ON TOM, WE GOT THIS! How many photos have ever been taken? [1000memories] (with a ton more info on the history and number of photographs taken to date, etc.) via Facebook’s Huge Trove Of Photos In Context [businessinsider] Thanks to Stephanie, who agrees in five years there won’t even be a Facebook anymore. Buttbook, absolutely. OMG — Booty booty booty booty rockin’ everywhere! And Geekologie on Facebook (just sayin — I’ve got pictures!)

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Facebook Hosts 4% Of All Photos Ever Taken

According to some numbers made up by some guy, Facebook use costs US employers around $280-billion anally. Hey, I was just as shocked as you were — there are asses involved. Also, only 7-minutes? LOLOLOL! You can visit guy’s website for a more thorough explanation of the breakdown but it’s really anybody’s guess (I guess a fifty zillion!) as to just how badly Facebook affects work productivity . Geekologie? Geekologie costs employers almost $200 a year. “That….sounds high.” Ouch. :’(’ ‘ 0 Facebook Costs US Employers $28,000,000,000 per year [thefitzpatrick] via Facebook Costs US Employers $280,000,000,000 Per Year [buzzfeed] Thanks to Josh, who’s convinced cat videos are the REAL problem here. Geekologie’s Facebook page because damn the man, that’s why

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Facebook Costs US Employers $280B Yearly

According a questionable study conducted by the The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University, the 70% of teenagers that use social media websites like Facebook and Twitter are almost “twice as likely to use marijuana, three times as likely to drink alcohol, and five times as likely to use tobacco” (previously: be insecure, narcissistic, and have low-self esteem ). Possibly because they interact with other people besides mom and dad. The other 30% are home-schooled. Oh — this questionable study just in: social media didn’t exist when I was growing up, and look how I turned out. SPOILER : A f***ing mess. Some experts say kids see images of teens drinking and using drugs online, which takes the shock value out of bad behavior and leads some to think it’s what everyone is doing. Some viewers on our Facebook page say they monitor their kids’ social networking habits closely so they know what’s happening on the websites. ” I will look through dressers, clothes, Facebook, PC’s, whatever I want to make sure my child is safe,” writes Kelly. “They will hate me now, but one day they will love and thank me.” First paragraph: there are experts, and then there are the experts that actually believe this shit. The second group are f***ing idiots. Third paragraph: or just always hate you. That’s a very real possibility. Ha — building relationships based on trust. I’M IN YOUR UNDERWEAR DRAWER LOOKING FOR WEED, LOLOL! Teens who use social media mostly likely to drink and use drugs, says study [king5news] Thanks to Evil Ares, who’s evil and uses the persuasive power of peer pressure to coerce his friends into doing things for him. Join in the debauchery on Geekologie’s Facebook and Tweeter

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Study: Social Media-Using Teens More Likely To Drink, Smoke, Do Drugs (And Prolly Sex!)

In b4 ‘I’d do her’. NOTE: Two bad words at 0:45. This is a video of Madelaine Zammit (who looks suspiciously like a cross between Jewel and Leelee Sobieski — can science do that now? Can two womens have a baby?) singing a song about Facebook . It’s okay. The best parts are 1. her accent and 2. the song between 0:40 - 1:00. If you only have time to watch twenty seconds, watch those ones. If you only have ten seconds to watch, well, you’re working waaaaay too f***ing hard for a Friday. God, what’s next — NOT taking a nap after lunch?! Hit the jump for the video. BFF Geekologie on Facebook HERE.

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Australian Girl Singing Facebook Song

Facebook , which can’t even manage to function properly because of all the other worthless bullshit they’ve added to the site, has decided to drop another turd on the pile, this time in the form of ‘Tag Suggestions’, facial recognition software that, after your face has been identified once in a friend’s album, will search the remaining pictures trying to find you. Nice try Facebook — too bad I’m a ninja! *karate-kicks copier* Sarah Jacobsson Purewal, of PC World magazine, said: ‘Opting out won’t keep Facebook from gathering data and recognizing your face - it’ll just keep people from tagging you automatically.’ She also warns: ‘Facial recognition technology will ultimately culminate in the ability to search for people using just a picture. ‘And that will be the end of privacy as we know it–imagine, a world in which someone can simply take a photo of you on the street, in a crowd, or with a telephoto lens, and discover everything about you on the internet.’ Admittedly, that thought is kind of scary. Granted not as scary as the dream where your parachute doesn’t open or your teeth fall out, but still pretty bad. Well, at least to a normal person. You wanna talk about the REAL end of privacy? I’ve had to drop a deuce in a jail cell before with eight other dudes trying to pretend they aren’t watching — this is f***ing NOOOOOOOTHING. Geekologie on Facebook and Twitter Facebook now knows what you look like as it rolls out face recognition by stealth [dailymail] Thanks to Danielle and Tom, who don’t show their faces on Facebook for fear of ol’ Zuckerberg falling in love and online-stalking them. Haha, that reminds me of the time I online stalked myself to impress my friends. They weren’t.

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Facebook, Now With More Facial Recognition

Note: That isn’t even the whole picture and I purposefully made it ultra-crappy quality so you’d have to click HERE to see the whole thing. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!! Jk jk, I just suck at Photoshop. Ever wonder what particular stereotype a social media website would be if it were in high school? “F*** NO.” Yeah me neither, that would be lame. *crumpling list of guesses* Now granted Geekologie isn’t really a social media website, but since we’re on the subject, I got to thinking about which one it would be. I’m leaning towards the smart, cool kid everyone respects plus gets made play from both the cheerleaders and band/drama ladies alike. “Special ed, hands down.” Special ed — that’s ridiculous! *licking keyboard* CHEETOOOOOOOS!! Class Of 2011: If Social Media Were a High School [flowtown] (where I go once a month!) Thanks to Jess, who would be the substitute teacher that was way cooler than your regular one and would let you talk the whole period instead of doing your worksheets and then tell your teacher the mimeograph machine was broken (oldschool!).

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What If: Social Media Websites Were High School Stereotypes (SPOILER: This Maybe?)

Pepsi plans to introduce a new line of touchscreen Pepsi machines that, not only serve cold beverages ( ? I like cold beverages ? ), but also help you interact with your friends by buying them sodas. Which, for the record — I AM NOT YOUR SUGAR DADDY. Get it? Because of all the sugar in soda! That’s why kids are so chubby. The new machines of course let you buy a beverage via a fancy animated UI, complete with swipe controls, but they also let you gift a Pepsi to a friend, or even a complete stranger through “Random Acts of Refreshment”. All you have to do is enter a friend’s name and cell phone number (I’m sure PepsiCo has NO plans to keep a database of such details) and they’ll receive a txt message with a special code that can be redeemed at any of the interactive machines. You even have the option of recording a 10-second personalized video message that will be played back when they redeem it. Or, you can send a caffeinated gift to a complete stranger in a different city if you’re feeling particularly philanthropic. Yeah, how about no. The only social networking Pepsi machine I need is one that can communicate with the vending machine next to it to choose the best snack to accompany my Mountain Dew. I kid, I kid. IT’S FLAMIN’ HOT CHEETOS, DERDER. Hit the jump for a video demo or something (I dunno, it looked boring so I skipped it).

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Too Far: Social Networking Pepsi Machines

Proving that the Geekologie fanpage’s precious status updates might not be as safe as previously thought, an unknown hacker took control of Mark Zuckerburg’s official Facebook fanpage this week, probably by guessing his password, “administrator”. Good one Mark, but I would’ve gone with “IOWNTHISBITCH111″. Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg’s fan page was hacked Tuesday — a high-profile breach on a site that constantly faces scrutiny about its handling of its members private data. “It’s not clear if he was careless with his password, was phished, or sat down in a Starbucks and got sidejacked while using an unencrypted wireless network,”….”However it happened, it’s left egg on his face just when Facebook wants to reassure users that it takes security and privacy seriously.” While the method of attack is still unclear, it’s crystal clear that Mark Zuckerburg has 2,836,752 more Facebook fans than Geekologie, making me question my entire existence. WTF DOES HE HAVE THAT I DON’T?! “Hepatitis?” You said it not me! Mark Zuckerberg’s Facebook page hacked [cnn] and Geekologie’s Presence on the Faceybooks Thanks to Evil Ares, who, while certainly evil, isn’t ‘hack-a-Facebook-fanpage’ evil. Good to know.

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Why Am I Not Surprised?: Mark Zuckerberg’s Official Facebook Fanpage Gets Hacked