If you’ve never heard of Minecraft it’s a little (per Wikipedia ) “sandbox game which allows players to build constructions out of textured cubes in a 3D world.” I know, I thought it looked like Wolfenstein 3-D too. Anyway, this is a tutorial on how to build a fireplace in your Minecraft home. Except not really because Captain Firehazard here ends up burning his place to the ground. It’s worth a watch for the commentary alone. Not unlike Dancing with the Stars . That little flamboyant guy cracks my shit up! The old one too! The girl not so much. Hit the jump for the worthwhile video, fire action starts at 1:10.

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How Not To Build A Fireplace In Minecraft

First of all, whoever started calling this thing a unicorn obviously failed Mythical Creatures 101 because, and I’m sure you know this, UNICORNS HAVE A UNI-CORN. This, if anything, is a duocorn , which are far less rare (I’ve even seen them dead on the side of the road ). One of the rarest creatures on the planet has been sighted in Laos. The saola, which has been dubbed the ‘Asian unicorn’ despite being double horned, hasn’t been photographed since 1999. The individual pictured above was captured and taken back to a small village, where it unfortunately died in captivity several days later. “Died in captivity” — HA! I mean, come on. Now I’m not saying somebody obviously killed it and ate its steak with the hopes of gaining magical powers, but I did just catch the redeye back from Laos and let me tell you, boy are my arms tired! Get it? Because I masturbate on long flights! Rare ‘Asian Unicorn’ Caught in Laos [wired] Thanks to Divo, TobyRaider, Romeo and Jesslyn, who agree its tears probably aren’t even strong enough to make potions.

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Weird, It Doesn’t Look Magical: Rare Asian ‘Unicorn’ Spotted For First Time In Decade

I dunno, maybe that’s the way Buzz is gonna look in Toy Story 3 . Michelle Obama channels Catwoman for White House Halloween extravaganza [dailymail] Thanks to Bill, who’s smart enough to recognize Samus when he sees her.

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White House Halloween Captioning Fail

This is a short video from the live-feed at NASA showing the group responsible for bombing the moon celebrating after a job well done. Just watch red shirt there get snubbed by black shirt after initiating a high-five sequence. THEY EVEN MAKE DIRECT EYE CONTACT. Geez, talk about awkward . I’ve only aborted a high-five once, and that was because I knew the guy didn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom. Seriously bro, I’m not touching your junk. Youtube Thanks to Martyn, who has never been denied a high-five BECAUSE HE WILL RIP YOUR ARM OFF AND DO IT HIMSELF IF YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.

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NASA’s Moon Bombing High-Five Fail

This is a video of a building demolition in Turkey (arguably my favorite country on rye) gone horribly wrong . Now I’m not saying I could have done better, but I totally could have. With fireworks. Youtube Thanks to Lord Tarl, who once imploded a building simply by looking at it funny (and secretly pushing the detonator).

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You Did It Wrong: Building Demolition Fail

This is a video of a building demolition in Turkey (arguably my favorite country on rye) gone horribly wrong . Now I’m not saying I could have done better, but I totally could have. With fireworks. Youtube Thanks to Lord Tarl, who once imploded a building simply by looking at it funny (and secretly pushing the detonator).

Originally posted here:
You Did It Wrong: Building Demolition Fail

Dripping candle is dripping. But seriously, I’ve been looking for a way to spice up the ol’ love life, and my hand doesn’t go numb anymore. So I’ve been thinking about ordering a hooker . I guess what I’m getting at is this: as a natural-born pyromaniac, is bring a flame into the bedroom safe? And, if so, what do you guys recommend? UPDATE : Hello, 911? YEAH — THERE IS A HOOKER ON FIRE IN MY APARTMENT! My name? My name is *click* Candle Fail [failblog] via In a Fight Between Candle and Laptop, Candle Usually Wins [gizmodo]

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Asleep At The Keyboard: Candle 1, Laptop 0