This is the world’s first carabiner key. It’s a key that’s also a teensy carabiner. How can they even make parts that small? Beats me, but you could ask God the same thing about your pecker! HAHA — BURN, Needlepeen! No word on cost, but they are a real product you can order from Scott Amron at Amron Experimental (who also brought us keyring keys ). But whatever you do, do NOT use them instead of actual climbing carabiners when you’re out on the mountain, because they will break, and you will plummet to your death. And, even if by some miracle you don’t die, you’ll still be locked out of your house. Food for thought. “That’s glue.” IT’S BRAIN FOOD. Amron Experimental Product Site Let’s learn how to pick locks together on Facebook and Twitter and then we can steal all the candy out of the vending machines at the laundromat

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It’s A Carabiner, It’s A Key, It’s A Carabiner Key!

Note: I know that screencap looks pretty booboo but I promise the video is actually cool. Hit the jump to watch it. This is a video of a samurai fighting some sort of shadow spirit made out of CG crows or some shit. I’m not really sure, but eventually it takes the form of the samurai’s shadow and he has to cut that f***er’s head off. It’s basically just a choreographed dance to a video being projected, but definitely still cool to see. Also, in your neighbors’ window when they’re changing. DAMN THAT’S ONE HAIRY ASS! Oh, wait a minute — now there’s two hairy asses. Aaaaaand they’re touching. Okay, so they might not be brothers after all. Hit the jump for the worthwhile video.

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COOOOL!: Samurai Shadow Sword-Fighting

But that rug really tied the room together! Using 3-D video-mapping technology, the guys at Mr. Beam were able to transform a plain white living room filled with plain white furniture into whatever kind of fancily decorated living room they desired by projecting different patterns onto the various elements. Coooooool. Now make the couch look like a pile of skulls! We created an unique physical 3D video mapping experience by turning a white living room into a spacious 360 projection area. This technique allowed us to take control of all colors, patterns and textures of the furniture, wallpapers and carpet. All done with 2 projectors. Granted it’s not very practical for an actual living room unless you live entirely in the kitchen and only admire the space from the tent you built out of a bedsheet and barstools, because once you step foot in there you gonna be casting all kinda shadows. And, just like that, your cool-lookin’ living room turns into less of a place to relax, and more of a place to be blinded by a projector and stub your toes on the f***ing coffee table. You think I won’t saw that leg off?! CONSIDER YOUR ASS TRIPODED! Hit the jump for the very worthwhile video.

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Eye Candy: 3-D Video-Mapped Living Room Is Like Having A Million Living Rooms In One

Note: Video is after the jump. To celebrate the recent release of Little Big Planet 2 (which I’m triple-fisting alongside Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood and a PB&J ), a group of fans went and created a level in real life using a couple stuffed Sackboys and a shit-ton of construction paper . Pretty cool, guys. But you know what would be even cooler? If they opened a theme park with a bunch of Little Big Planet levels that humans could run through. How awesome would that be?! I know I’d give upwards of $50 to get in. Just kidding, but I would give the ticket-taker an HJ. What?! Rght, like I’m the only who’s ever diddled a Trader Joe’s cashier for a free steak before! Hit the jump for 2:00 of cuteness.

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Dawwwww: ‘Little Big Planet’ Recreated IRL

Apple software engineer Andrew Carol (woman’s first name for a last name FTW!) went and built a completely functional Antikythera Mechanism out of LEGO . What the hell’s an Antikythera Mechanism? *GW casts copy/paste and goes to toast some Eggos* The Antikythera Mechanism, is, allegedly, the oldest version of a scientific computer. The Greeks, who used to be so clever that they never endured too much of a financial crisis, built it around 100 B.C. Somehow, it disappeared into history’s cracks, until it was unearthed from a shipwreck in 1901. It took imperfect humans another 100 years to work out that its purpose was to mechanically track the bodies that are in outer space in order to anticipate events up there that might affect life down here. Carol used 1,500 Lego Technic parts and 30 days to put together the 110 gears and other pieces of the re-creation. The two wings of Carol’s machine, each with four gearboxes, manage to make the same calculations as the original mechanism. Each gearbox makes one mathematical calculation. It’s funny how they call Andrew by his last name in the article and it makes it sound like he’s a lady. Also, that falsetto of his. But I’m not here to talk about girly-men, I’m here to talk about 2,000-year old gearboxes. Which — if the ancient Greeks could make gearboxes, then they must have had cars . The history books are wrong! THIS. CHANGES. EVERYTHING. But mostly just history books. Hit the jump for a worthwhile video of the device in action.

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2,000-Year Old Computer Recreated In LEGO

I hate needles . Needles and robots can both go jump into a volcano as far as I’m concerned. Preferably one that leads straight to hell. But NOT a beach, because I stepped on a needle at the beach once and — joking, that was a jellyfish . Still hurt though. Not as bad as the time I had to pry my arm out of the jaws of a shark , but I did run into a burning house to save like eight-hundred kittens once. F***ing animal hoarders . Want to know how to make a LEGO syringe? You’re in luck, because LEGO-builder Sean Michael Ragan has already done all the heavy lifting. But not leg-lifting, because he isn’t territorial. Me? Already marked every wall in the new apartment. Hit the jump for blue and radioactive versions, along with the build diagram and a link to Sean’s website (with piece list) and Etsy store (where he sells kits for $20).

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NEEDLE TO THE VEIN!: A LEGO Syringe

Alternatively, “Luke, I am your fonter.” God I hate myself for that . And, well, pretty much everything else I’ve ever done. Anyway, because some Geekologie Readers have to go home and give themselves glitterstim enemas if I don’t meet their daily quota of Star Wars posts, here’s a small gallery (read: three pictures) of characters created entirely out of different fonts by Italian ad firm H-57 Creative Station. This is Darth Maul or somebody here, but there’s a Cylon and a Fraggle after the jump. Huh? ARE YOU QUESTIONING MY GEEK CREDENTIALS?! Fine — fine, this is Darth Vader , and there’s a Stormtrooper and Yoda after the jump. What isn’t after the jump is the X-Wingding Fighter I just spent two hours making in Photoshop. I’ll email you a copy for $1 though. Ass Xerox for $2. Hit the jump for the other two.

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Use The Fonts, Luke: Star Wars Typography

Woops. Big enough to be read version HERE . This is a map of the United States according to movies that took place in the various states. As you can see, ‘What about Bob?’ took place in, uh, what is that, North Hampshire? Okay so I failed geography , big deal. Also, my most recent drug test, which means I have to report back to the clink on Monday. Ha, Monday. Like I’m not gonna wake up there tomorrow! Love the smell of a holding-cell in the morning. Getting teabagged, not so much. The United States Of Movies [buzzfeed]

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U.S. Map According To Where Movies Took Place

This is one in a series of vintage ads for current websites as imagined by Brazilian advertising agency Moma. Mmmm, I can almost smell the old magazines. the ads were designed for an upcoming media seminar with the overall theme of “what’s new today, is old tomorrow”, so they retro stylized Facebook, Youtube and Skype (and Twitter, not in English). Oh man, I love looking at vintage ads. Especially the underwear ones . There’s no telling what kind of crazy-ass bush is lurking behind those granny panties! Hit the jump for the other three.

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These Tubes Are Old!: Vintage Website Ads

Brother (the printer /sewing machine company, not my brother Frank), has developed vibration -powered batteries that promise to stay charged simply by shaking them. Shake Weight battery chargers? I think so! Called the Vibration-powered Generating Battery (maybe in the future we’ll all ask for VGBs instead of Energizers), the batt’s fit in any regular ol’ AA or AAA slot. Of course, there are already plenty of rechargeable alternatives out there — and most gadgets today just use lithium-ion batteries — though you still need to plug either in if you want to get some juice. With vibration-powered batteries, you’d be able to charge up anywhere, anytime. Okay, so typically I don’t share my scientific discoveries with anyone, but this one’s just too good to keep to myself. So check it: you take a bunch of these batteries, and you jam them in a vibrator . Boom — PERPETUAL. F***ING. MOTION! Double entendre, count it! New vibration-powered batteries make charging easier than ever [dvice]

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The Future: Vibration Powered Batteries