This is a short video of a cat playing Duck Hunt . You can tell he’s good because he doesn’t hesitate to go right after that annoying f***ing dog . I also love how he keeps waiting for the birds to fly out the top of the monitor . Haha, animals — so stupid . But seriously, where do they go when they fly offscreen? Please don’t say hell, please don’t say hell, please don’t say hell. “Hell”. GAAAH, YOU JUST DID THAT TO HURT ME, DIDN’T YOU?! You’re sick. Hit the jump for some blatant disregard for proper gaming peripherals.

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Cats With Guns: Kitty Playing Duck Hunt

Luxury water shouldn’t exist . As far as I’m concerned, there should only be two grades of water: frugal (that’s brown and might make you sick), and plain. We don’t need anything higher than that besides beer . The luxury bottled water comes in five colors which represent different themes: Red (friendship), Pink (cute), yellow (heartful), green (wish) and lavender (sweet). You can buy all five for $500 or individually at $100 a pop $100/bottle?! You could drink nothing but Magical brand unicorn milk for cheaper! I should know, I’m an authorized dealer. Just sayin’ folks, $79/gallon . Note: GW not responsible for those who claim his unicorn milk is actually spoiled 2%. Those chunks contain the magic! Hello Kitty Luxury Water [kittyhell] Thanks to mud, who, fun fact: is just water and dirt mixed together.

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It’s All I Drink: $100/Bottle Hello Kitty Water

Oscar the grouch kitty was sleeping in a field when his back legs got run over by a combine harvester. That story smelling fishy as shit aside, now he has bionic legs. His new kitten heels were designed with custom-made implants, which “peg” the ankle to the foot and mimic the way deer antler bone grows through skin. In a three-hour procedure, the veterinary surgical team inserted the pegs by drilling into one of Oscar’s ankle bones in each of his back legs. The implants, which are attached to the bone at the amputation site, were coated with hydroxyapatite to encourages bone cells to grow onto the metal. Oscar was trying to stand a day after the surgery and, despite some problems with infection, he was able to bear weight equally on all four limbs within four months. Fitzpatrick said the patient had made a remarkable recovery. “Oscar can now run and jump about as cats do,” he said. Heartwarming, isn’t it? Also kind of gross. But mostly heartwarming. I swear, medicine’s sure come a long way, hasn’t it? Reminds me of the time my little sister broke her arm. We had to put her down . Video report with bionic-foot footage after the jump.

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Your Kneading Feels Different: A Bionic Kitty

From now on I’m gonna start posting videos after the jump to minimize scriptage on the front page so that those of you rocking dial up modems can still read Geekologie from your caves while you’re busy mailing homemade bombs. So, yeah, this is video of a super-surprised looking kitty. Which, HOW PRECIOUS IS HE?! I just wanna eat him up like Cruella wanted to eat all those puppies! Hit the jump for the video.

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WANT: Surprised Kitty Is Surprised, Precious

I don’t get the chance to watch much television since my tv got repo’d but if I did I may have seen this Microsoft commercial for Windows 7 featuring Kylie, the cute Asian girl. Admittedly, I did like the ad . But that’s because I’m a sucker for any commercial featuring The Final Countdown . Even tampon ones. Youtube Thanks to jon, who still sells products the really old fashioned way: from cave to cave.

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Windows 7 Commercial With Cute Little Girl

This is by far the most important thing you’ll watch all day (suck it, the news!). It’s a kitten crawling into a couch . I love how its little legs are poking out before it can pull itself in. Did it remind anyone else of a calf being born, but in reverse ? No? Fine, me neither then. Dicks. Youtube Thanks to Sophia, who knows important shit when she sees it.

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This Is Important: Cat Crawling Into A Couch

This is probably older than the topical gel I found in the back of my medicine cabinet while hunting for my Valtrex multi-vitamins, but that doesn’t affect the cuteness. As you can see, it’s a cat dressed up as Link . Making him the coolest cat ever (besides your own, I’m sure). Granted, he forgot the apostrophe in “I’m” and can’t capitalize to save his last half-heart , but he’s a cat for crying out loud. They’re notoriously poor with grammar. And also, in general. MR. WHISKERS — YOU’RE LATE ON RENT AGAIN! Picture [wtfux] Thanks to Spikey DaPikey, who agrees he could only be cuter if he was swinging a wooden sword.

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It’s Dangerous To Go Alone. Take This.