Period Panties are $12 colored skivvies for ladies to wear while they’re on their monthly emotion-fest so they don’t ruin a pair of frilly lace ones. Or something. Honestly, I don’t know anything about women and only learned last week vaginas aren’t oriented sideways like I always imagined. So yeah, I’m probably the wrong person to ask for stuff like this. For directions, sure, but I am going to send you into the worst part of town I can think of. Which, fun fact: is my neighborhood. Then I’ll follow you on my bike and beat you up and steal your hubcaps. I’MMA SELL ‘EM FOR CRACK! Hit the jump for the two other designs and a link to the product site.

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You Don’t Even Want To Know: Period Panties

This guy got six Pokball tattoos down his arm and the area beneath each stuffed with a subdermal implant to make them all appear 3-D . Not really sure what else to say, except rubbing elbows with him would almost certainly make me queasy. Not unlike eating a can of cat food because you lost a bet to eat a whole bowl of dog food without puking. Gambling problems: I have one. Also, a sore throat and clogged sink. Um, Nice Pokballs [kotaku] Thanks to Stephen, who knows a guy with a tattoo of 3-D boobs on his arm but one of the titty implants migrated to dude’s armpit. LOLWUT?!

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DO NOT WANT TO CATCH ANY: Guy Gets Series Of 3-D Pokball Tattoos On Arms

This is a video of Snake Eyes practicing his ninja-ing in G.I. Joe’s highly sophisticated training arena his backyard while being critiqued by a sun sculpture, a buddha statue, a skull coffee mug, some free weights, and two sets of horseshoes. One thing’s for certain: if you’re a gallon of milk , 2-liter soda bottle or jug of kitty litter, this is NOT the ninja to f*** with. But if you have at least a broken nunchuck and any coordination whatsoever you could easily kill the poor bastard. Unless he whips out his bow & arrow , in which case he’ll probably do it himself. Remember Snake Eyes: Knowing when to quit is half the battle. Hit the jump for a video of G.I. Joe’s latest rejection letter in action.

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Snake Eyes Practicing His Ninja Moves

Like this! Granted it’s not a new concept because I remember my freshman year of college (’99) my roommate and I used to play Counter-Strike on opposing clans and we’d each hang a bedsheet over the side of our loft so the other person couldn’t see you. Which, fun fact: also worked great for masturbating . For him anyways, I didn’t care if he watched me or not just as long as he let me have one of the sausage biscuits he kept in the mini-fridge afterward. “Uh, GW? That sounded a little too realistic not to be true.” I told you, I ONLY SPEAK THE TRUTH! But, from now on — only to strangers. Damn yeah I want some free candy, mister! Nice van BTW. Hit the jump for one more shot of a similar but different setup.

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How To: Prevent Cheating When Playing Multiplayer Games With Your Roommate

The Conversacube is a make-believe product that prevents stagnant conversation on a date by providing constant suggestions of things to say to the troll your mom set you up with. “Your eyes, they’re just so….far apart.” Lauren McCarthy’s idea seems harmless enough - a gadget that helps people be more sociable. Hell, if this thing was real it’s definitely something you and your date can talk about. It would also have family and kids versions, both of which are equally ridiculous. I’m pretty sure this is a commentary on how reliant people can be on technology and how some people are becoming more used to digital means of socializing than with physical or face-to-face interaction. Because as a serious concept this thing is just sad. Listen: I 100% agree with the commentary that technology is making it more difficult for some people to function in social situations. And that is EXACTLY why I’m opening a school that teaches folks how to be social. It’s gonna be called the ‘Geekologie Writer’s Non-nonprofit Institute for a Personable Society’. Sign up today, space in GW’s NIPS is extremely limited (they’re like the size of dried apricots). Hit the jump for the cube in action on a date.

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Conversacube: Never An Awkward Moment

The Snazzy Napper is a real-ass product that, despite the name, isn’t really very snazzy (Bedazzle that shit, God!). What it is is a piece of cheap fabric you velcro around your head so you can rest in peace (I’ll kill you!) while you travel. Did I mention it has a hole for your nose so you don’t suffocate in how stupid you look? Because it does. Interested but don’t want to spend your hard earned $15? No problem! Here’s what you do: close your f***ing eyes. Hit the jump for a commercial and get ready to count some Z’s!

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Nap AND Look Cool With The Snazzy Napper

Note: Video is after the jump because I don’t want you kids getting any ideas (yes, yes I do too — you should try it with the tailgate down ). This is a video of somebody’s grandpa passed out in a La-Z-Boy in the back of a speeding truck. Actually, he might be dead. But if not, he will be soon! And you know what that means: more Jello for us. Hit the jump for the video.

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What, No Safety Belt?: Grandpa Passed Out In La-Z-Boy In Back Of A Speeding Truck

You read correctly: Batman and Superman is havin’ a baby together. No word yet on the sex, but I bet it’s gonna be a bat boy! Get it? Because they did it in the butt. Batman’s made up his mind, he’s keeping Superman’s baby [io9] Thanks to silvermidnight, who wants to have Aquaman’s baby so the little tyke can put an end to these oil leak shenanigans. Ah, child labor.

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Batman Pregnant With Superman’s Baby

NOTE: Commercial for the WTF You’ve Got To Be Kidding Me Blanket is after the jump. The Better Marriage Blanket is an actual damn product , officially signaling the end of mankind. Or maybe just flatulence -related divorces! It’s basically a comforter with a layer of activated carbon sewn in so when you rip a squirty one your partner doesn’t have to smell it. Unless they’re into that sort of thing, in which case I have a blanket beyond their wildest dreams. Hit it for the I know I shouldn’t be surprised this exists but I’m still disappointed with humanity.

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It’s Anti-Toot!: The Better Marriage Blanket

Note: Video of Princess Pissypants is after the jump. Further proving the questionable reality of her initial video , Starcraft II Beta Breakup girl is back at it, this time smashing one of her ex-boyfriend’s windows with a brick and tossing a running hose in the hole. WTF, PSYCHO?! Admittedly, the ol’ running hose in a window is one of my favorite paybacks, but this girl didn’t even wait for guy to go on vacation. YOU DID IT WRONG, STUPID! Now — enough of the attention whoring, back to crying into a pillow and wishing you dated a vampire. Hit it for the video.

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FAKE: Starcraft Breakup Girl Is Back At It