Seen here looking suspiciously like a futuristic TNT detonator, The Airdrop is basically a dehumidifier for use outdoors that can pull water from the air, and use it to water thirsty plants . Which reminds me…*opening closet door* Have you learned your lesson, fern?! “Waaaaaaaaaaaater me.” *slams door* TWO MORE DAYS OF SOLITARY FOR NOT ADDRESSING ME AS GW, GIVER OF LIFE! With a deceptively modest design, Airdrop filters hot environmental air through a turbine, feeding it through a copper tubing system–with copper wool to maximize surface area–and into the earth where it cools and releases moisture. The dry air is then re-released into the atmosphere and the collected water pumped through semi-porous hoses to the plant roots. In his initial prototype, which was much smaller than the current design, Linnacre was able to produce a liter of water per day. Impressive, but a liter of water a day — that’s…not a whole lot for a bunch of thirsty plants in a drought. I’m afraid if they don’t wind up making these thing bigger you’re gonna have to choose just which weed plant you want to survive. This ‘air harvester’ pulls water from thin air in times of drought [dvice] Thanks to Harry, who agrees you should at least try a rain dance first.

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I Don’t Drought It: ‘Airdrop’ Machine Pulls Water From Air To Feed Starving Plants

Google was recently awarded a patent for this ’see with your hand’ device, a glove with a fingertip camera/sensors that would allow you to ’see’ what your fingers do (SPOILER: boogers) or control a computer with hand gestures. *flipping the bird, computer downloads virus* “[W]hen a small object is lost, for example, underneath a couch, humans naturally put their hands under the couch to locate the lost object by touch,” the filing says. “While gathering information by touch is in some cases an acceptable substitute for seeing, in many situations it may be desirable to ’see’ the inaccessible environment to better gather information.” Sure you could use a Google Powerglove to retrieve lost Cheetos from under the couch, or — OR — you could use a flashlight and crouch down to look under there with your own two eyes. “YAAAAR — RUDE THIS WRITER IS RUDE.” Sorry — or your own one eye if you’re a pirate. Sweet hook, Captain Emotional. Google patents a glove for ’seeing with your hand’ [geekwire] via Google Patents Glove For “Seeing With Your Hand” [slashdot] Thanks to Thaylor, who’s praying this is NOT the future of p0rn.

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You Will Never Be A Powerglove!: Google’s Recent ‘See With Your Hand’ Patent

Note: 5-second video after the jump probably NSFW on account of a bra being clapped off and exposing a pair of pastied titties I had to watch three times to make sure weren’t mine. The clap-off bra : not as cool as an ogle-and-drool-off bra, but this isn’t exactly the future we’re living in either. There’s a link to the rather complicated-looking Instructable showing you how to make your own step-by-step after the jump, or you could, I dunno, LEARN HOW TO UNHOOK A DAMN BRA. Alternatively, only date ladies who don’t wear them. What are they called again? Oh right — dudes. Five seconds of “dammit why didn’t these exist when I was in college?” after the jump.

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The Clap-Off Bra — Clasp On, But Clap Off

Why it actually needs to grow a sleeve instead of just having one pre-installed is beyond me, but I suspect it has something to do with NOVELTY. Which, fun fact: rich people will pay for. Also, their pets back if you kidnap them. Anyway, the Heatswell Coffee Cup from Amron Experimental (designers of the Split-Ring-Key , Leather Band-Aids and the Brush & Rinse ). Features: - No sleeves to slide on or fall down - Stacks thin like a coffee cup - Insulates fat like a coffee collar - Hot Beverage activates insulating band - 3D logos pop when hot drinks are poured - Design textures with 0-1 inch swells - Knitted-on cloth towel feel - Saves time by removing a routine step - Save on shipping sleeves separately - Non-toxic and FDA approved - Recyclable and Biodegradable - Insulates with less material - Will not swell at shipping temperatures - Costs less Okay, so maybe there are some advantages. As you can see from the pictures, the sleeve starts off looking pretty normal, then, when a hot beverage (or urine) is added, starts growing AND DOESN’T STOP until it looks like a wrinkled ol’ pair of granny panties. Which — you ever tried that blue dye they use in adult diaper commercials? I went blind in one eye for over 12-hours. LUHJIT! Hit the jump for a video demonstration of the grower not a show-er and a link to the official site where they’ll send you a free sample to amaze your friends.

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Disposable Coffee Cup Grows Its Own Sleeve

This is a patent from 1963 for a device that’s supposed to make birthing easier by practically shooting babies out of vaginas with the helpful hand of centrifugal force . Basically a woman is strapped into this thing, it starts spinning like mad, and she projectile vomits for a while until PRESTO! a baby comes flying out like a circus clown out of a cannon. Thankfully, the newborn is caught by a special baby-catching net (DO NOT FORGET TO ATTACH THE NET!) between the woman’s legs and the apparatus immediately shuts down. Wow, and to think 50-years later this isn’t the standard practice. WHY YOU LADIES GOTTA HATE ON SCIENCE?! Apparatus For Facilitating The Birth Of A Child By Centrifugal Force [googlepatents] Thanks to Dot.AY, who heard water-births are where it’s at. EVIAN BABIES FTW!

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Giving Birth As Terrifying Carnival Ride: 1963 ‘Apparatus For Facilitating The Birth Of A Child By Centrifugal Force’ Patent

Balloon Boy’s father, best known for being a jackass loser (and raising boys that look suspiciously like girls, picture related), has gotten into the inventing game, and just released his first POS, the $20 “Bear Scratcher”, a tree branch you screw to the wall and scratch your back on like an animal . A bear specifically. Uh, shouldn’t you be in prison getting your back scratched with penises? “If you itch like a son of a twitch, than you need my latest invention,” shouts a wild-eyed Mr. Heene before rubbing his back feverishly against the Bear Scratch. “Arrrrgh!” he yells, while a twangy country jingle playing in the background praises the device. And Mr. Heene’s Web site promises that hundreds more “very cool gadgets” are coming in the future, for those people — most predictably, the news media — that can’t help but scratch an itch for Mr. Heene’s misadventures. First of all, nobody wants anything that looks like a giant turd hanging on the wall of their home. And secondly — $20 for a tree branch? What do you mean “patent pending”?! How is a stick even an invention?! GOD’S CREDIT BALLOON BOY’S DAD IS STEALING GOD’S CREDIT. Painful commercial for the POS after the jump.

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Shouldn’t You Be In Jail?: "Balloon Boy’s" Dad Selling POS ‘Bear Scratch’ Back Scratchers

The Snazzy Napper is a real-ass product that, despite the name, isn’t really very snazzy (Bedazzle that shit, God!). What it is is a piece of cheap fabric you velcro around your head so you can rest in peace (I’ll kill you!) while you travel. Did I mention it has a hole for your nose so you don’t suffocate in how stupid you look? Because it does. Interested but don’t want to spend your hard earned $15? No problem! Here’s what you do: close your f***ing eyes. Hit the jump for a commercial and get ready to count some Z’s!

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Nap AND Look Cool With The Snazzy Napper

Hat Cams are perfect for the spy who doesn’t really understand spying . I’m looking at you, Mr. Bond . You couldn’t spy your way out of a wet-paper bag with a laser watch and bow-tie camera ! Also, go get tested. Hat Cams are $30 hats with a standard camera mount attached to the bill. Sure they’ll make you look ridiculous, but you’re going to anyways crawling around on the floor trying to look up women’s skirts. Product Site via Hatcam HC10 Is A Marvel Of Cinematic Innovation [ohgizmo] Thanks to John, who, BOOM — HEADSHOT! And to There’s A Hole In My Heart, who just depressed the hell out of me.

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Look Ma, No Hands! (Or Dignity): Hat Cams

The ThermaHelm motorcycle helmet keeps your brain on ice in the event of an accident . That’s important because if you’ll recall those anti-drug commercials from yesteryear: a cooked egg brain is no good. Except with buttered toast. I say throw a halved grapefruit into the mix and I’m….damnit, stay focused, GW. The ThermaHelm is a carbon-fiber lid with two lightweight chemical packs — one water, the other ammonium nitrate — built into the lining of the helmet. In the event of impact, the contents of the two packs mix together, triggering a cooling reaction. The $490 invention will be launched in the UK in May this year, and they are already developing a more sophisticated version which, at $815, will include a video camera, GPS and Bluetooth. Well I don’t know about you, but there’s no price too high to pay for my heath. Unless insurance won’t cover it, in which case, I want you to pull the plug. I’m not waking up to a million dollar medical bill. I’d rather go bang dinos in space heaven. ThermaHelm ice pack helmet saves lives and frozen peas [dvice]

Link:
Ya Best Protect Ya Neck Brain, Or At Least Keep It Cold After A Motorcycle Accident

You know how a jar of natural peanut butter separates into two layers: a rock hard layer of solid peanut particles on the bottom, and a liquid layer of oil that splashes onto the kitchen counter and your clothes when you try to stir the two layers together? John Falk Kelly didn’t like it when that happened, so he came up with a way to mix peanut butter easily. From Wired’s How-To Wiki: When you buy a jar of all-natural peanut butter, don’t stick it in the pantry. Park it on top of the refrigerator, upside down. Once a day, when you walk by it, say “hello peanut butter”, and flip it over. When you’re ready to open it and stir it up, it will be half mixed for you (and not hardened into a frustrating marble block). He says he was so pleased with the results, that filed a patent on it: U.S. Patent # 6,325,533 . I’m thinking someone could make a version of this that used some of the same circuitry and components in the hourglass random number generator project I posted earlier today. The jar of peanut butter would go where the hourglass is. The gadget could either sense the opacity of the oil and flip it when it was no longer translucent, or it could just flip it once or twice a day. Stir natural peanut butter easily

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Stir natural peanut butter easily