This is a fake-ass video of two quantum levitating hover cars racing around a little track inspired by the Playstation classic Wipe’Out . People are passing it around like it’s real, but it’s not — it’s fake. I assume they’ll announce a new Wipe’Out game in the next couple weeks. Ooooooooooooor maybe it’s real. Maybe scientists actually do spend their time making sketchy videos of meticulously reconstructed video game hover cars and race tracks with a giant ‘ ‘WIPEOUT’ printed right in the middle. *eyerolls so hard I lose a contact* Seriously folks, you really can’t believe everything you see. Half the time it’s just aliens playing tricks on us with laser beams! Hit the jump for the worthwhile but fake as shit video.

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Smells Viral: Quantum Levitating Toy Racecar Track

Because the government knows something we don’t and isn’t telling us, the first nationwide test of the emergency broadcast system is slated to go down at 2PM eastern today, simultaneously playing on all entertainment outlets (sans internet). OMG — cut into my One Life to Live and you’re gonna have a real f***ing emergency on your hands! The 30-second test, to be overseen by the Federal Emergency Management Agency and the Federal Communications Commission, will run on radio, satellite radio and TV stations in all 50 states and U.S. territories. It will include alert “beeps” and the words “This is a test.” Here’s how FEMA explains it: We need to know that the system will work as intended should public safety officials ever need to send an alert or warning to a large region of the United States. Only a complete test of the Emergency Alert System can help us identify any changes and improvements needed to modernize this system and make it fully accessible. Any guesses what the government is keeping from us? Because it’s gonna look mighty suspicious when the government tests the emergency broadcast system nationwide for the first time today and then aliens attack on Thanksgiving. I expect they’ll strike when we’re all doped up on turkey. FEMA to test nationwide emergency alert system at 2 p.m. ET [usatoday] Thanks to Allison, who asks, “do you remember where you were when the US tested the emergency broadcast system nationwide for the first time?” F*** no, I was at work staring at a computer screen like a normal person!

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Something Bad’s Gonna Happen!: US To Test First Nationwide Use Of Emergency Broadcast System

The US government , best known for doing everything in its power keep the general populace in the dark about anything of interest, has issued a statement claiming no knowledge of aliens or any coverups related to extraterrestrial life. Oh, real cool gubment — LYING STRAIGHT TO MY SAGGY MAN-TITS. These petitions were sparked by an Obama administration initiative called “We the People.” Initially, the White House said staffers would respond and consider taking action on any issue that received at least 5,000 online signatures within 30 days. The requirement has since been raised to 25,000 signatures. “The U.S. government has no evidence that any life exists outside our planet, or that an extraterrestrial presence has contacted or engaged any member of the human race,” Phil Larson from the White House Office of Science and Technology Policy reported on the WhiteHouse.gov website.”In addition, there is no credible information to suggest that any evidence is being hidden from the public’s eye.” The Paradigm Research Group, one of the organizations promoting the petitions, said that the response by a “low-level staffer” was unacceptable and that it would begin a new petition campaign. Ahahahhahaha @ “low-level staffer”. Phil Larson is a real person with real feelings you know. There’s no question he’s read this, and what did you do? YOU HURT HIM. Would you have been happier if they reanimated Roosevelt and Eisenhower’s bodies and had him write the report? Because the government can do that too. White House: There’s no sign of E.T. or UFO cover-up [msnbc] Thanks to rob, Brianna and Preacher62, who agree there’s definitely something the government isn’t telling us: everything.

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ALL LIES: Government Denies Knowledge Of Exterrestial Life Or Any Related Coverups

Facebook just got outed for including (non Girl Scout ) cookies that have the potential to track a user’s movement across the interwebs even when signed out of the site . I…feel violated. Get it? I just sat on a dog toy! When Australian programmer Nik Cubrilovic first blogged on Sunday about how Facebook logout didn’t seem to actually, uh, log out, the company went into damage control mode, insisting that “Facebook does not track users across the web,” which was pretty funny given that Facebook has a tracking feature its CEO literally calls “Facebook Across the Web.” The company also said, “logged out cookies… are used for safety and protection…” Except it turns out one cookie wasn’t used for “safety and protection,” as a Facebook engineer has admitted to Cubrilovic now that the press storm is subsiding. One cookie, “a_user,” continued to report your user ID back to Facebook after you logged out, until you shut down your browser entirely. The cookie was only visible to Facebook, but the site could have used it to track your visits to other sites if it wished, since a great many websites feature “Facebook Connect” widgets that load content from facebook.com — transmitting cookies to Facebook each time they do so. Oh shishi Facebook, you bein’ bad! *calling Zuckerberg* Hey Zuck — it’s me, the Geekologie Writer. THE GEEKOLOGIE WRITER, DAMMIT, DON’T ACT LIKE YOU DON’T KNOW WHO I AM! Huh? No Y, it’s with an I-E at the end. Listen Zuck, let me cut to the chase — I’m calling about something really serious today. I need you to float me $10-million. Why You Never Really Log Out of Facebook [gawker] Thanks to Joe and JoeLickASac, who, wow, two different Joes on one tip, what the chances of that happening?! “Not small enough to be worth mentioning.” Oh.

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Faceybooks: Never Not Tracking That Ass

Note: The high-res versions of the landing sites are HERE (Apollo 12), HERE (Apollo 14) and HERE (Apollo 17). You know how your grandma is still convinced the moon landing never happened and it was all faked by Hollywood ? She’s a smart lady, I can see where you get it from. This is a series of high-res photos from NASA showing the Apollo 12, 14 and 17 landing sites and the imprints left by humanity there. Granted they were all faked in the Photoshop building at Area 54, but they’re still fun to look at. So yeah, if you don’t like them you should probably consider take a long walk off a short pier into the sea. “Of Tranquility?!” Dude — you should f***ing blog. Hit the jump for a couple videos because videos are worth a thousand pictures or something. At least a hundred.

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You Can Even See The Tire Tracks!: NASA’s High-Res Pictures The Apollo Landing Sites

Gamestop, best known for not having a location that’s walkable from my apartment despite my insistent and strongly worded complaints, is now being accused of opening and pulling the free online promotional codes from new copies of Deux Ex: Human Revolution that would allow players to play the game online via the OnLive streaming game system. Why would they do such a thing? Money . It’s always about money. And, okay — sometimes it’s about getting even. But this time it was definitely about money. Per GameSPY: “Square Enix packed the competitor’s coupon with our DXHR product without our prior knowledge and we did pull and discard these coupons,” [Gamestop public relations representative Beth] Sharum said. To put the value of the promotion in context, OnLive is also selling DXHR through its online platform for $49.99. In April, GameStop acquired streaming tech company Spawn Labs and digital distribution platform Impulse. With the acquisitions, the retailer positioned itself to launch a hybrid Steam/OnLive service that will allow gamers to purchase and download full video games or stream and play them on demand. GameStop’s fully integrated Impulse service launched in July and its game streaming service is now in beta testing. Consumers who were expecting the free OnLive DXHR coupon are obviously outraged. The question is, does GameStop have the right to crack open copies of the game and remove the competitor’s coupons? Hoho — so you own your own streaming/downloading game service, do you? The plot thickens! Like starting to cook mac & cheese but then passing out drunk and waking up to a house fire. *eying charred kitchen* I’ll admit it, I have a problem. It’s called not getting enough sleep. GameStop Pulled, Discarded Free OnLive Deus Ex: Human Revolution Coupons [gamespy] Thanks to The Superficial Writer , who I catch playing Magic: The Gathering every time I sign into my PS3. Not even kidding.

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Gamestop Opens & Pulls Promotional Codes From Copies Of Deus Ex: Human Revolution

These are actual photographs of water droplets falling in front of a print of MC Escher’s iconic ‘ Relativity ‘. There’s a shot of the reddit photographer Smsilton’s setup after the jump if you want to see how it was made, which, amazingly, didn’t involve trapping a wizard in an hourglass and forcing him to freeze time. Or did it? I SAID SHOW ME THE HOURGLASS! Oh God Gandalf nooooooooooooooo!! Hit the jump for the setup, which may or may yes have involved several stacks of CD’s.

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Water Drop Falling In Front Of MC Escher Print

$9 Soylent Green crackers : not made with people , but with a made with people pricetag. That’s a little questionable. But they are packed with spinach and “high energy plankton”, so you can at least get your Popeye on knowing you’re doing The Krusty Krab a service. Soylent Green Crackers are the food stuff the world has been waiting for. A pleasing green cracker is low in fat and full of spinach, high energy plankton, and a special blend of herbs and people. Wait, what? Did we say people? DID WE SAY PEOPLE? OH SNAP - SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!! Ok, it’s not really people. But Soylent Green Crackers are delicious and a great conversation piece . Listen: if you’re down to buying novelty crackers as a conversation piece, your ass needs to find some shit to talk about pronto BECAUSE THAT IS JUST F***ING SAD. Hey guys — did you see my Soylent Green crackers on the table? They’re people! LOLOL. What else, what else? So, how about that weather tod– leaving so soon? ThinkGeek Product Site Thanks to David, who’ll eat anything with BBQ or Polynesian sauce on it. Pfft, who wouldn’t?!

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Soylent Green: Real Product, Not Real People

Mike Duke, who might have the simplest name ever, modded his late-model Mercury Cougar (which I used to own back in 2001 before sliding it off an icy road , wrapping it around a couple trees and winding up in the ICU for 11 days) into a Bugatti Veyron . Basically by fabricating a giant body kit . Now I know what you’re thinking, and it’s true: you almost lost your Geekologie Writer before you even knew him. Petrolhead Mike Duke, 25, spent nine months transforming his Ford Cougar into a red and black imitation of the 1,000bhp motor. A specially-designed bodykit makes it indistinguishable from a 1million Veyron and the interior has been re-styled and covered in leather. But the engine is the Cougar’s standard 2.5 litre V6 model, meaning its power falls well short of the 1,000bhp developed by the Veyron’s 8-litre powerplant. This means 0-62mph in 8.2 seconds and a top speed of 140mph - a way off the Veyron’s 2.5 seconds and 253mph. Why? Why do single men do anything — to trick women into coming home with them. *fumbling around with keys, finally opens door* “This apartment is dingy.” It’s a safehouse baby, I’m hiding out. “Driving that sports car?” I’m a spy, and spy’s drive fancy cars. “Who are you?” Duke, Mike Duke — Her Majesty’s Secret Service Center and Autobody Repair. Hit the jump for several more shots of the in-process and a couple more angles of the finished product PLUS A LINK TO THE EBAY AUCTION WHERE YOU CAN BUY THE THING ($89K) AND LIVE THE DREAM.

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Man Convincingly Mods $2,000 Mercury Cougar Into $2Million Bugatti Veyron Lookalike

Seen here beckoning your wiener to an untimely dismemberment, robotic dental patient Showa Hanako 2 (Showa Hanako 1 here ) opens wide for the camera. Now quick — toss a stick of dynamite in there and duck behind the x-ray shield! …this humanoid was originally developed last year as a tool for dentists looking to practice new procedures. Now, engineers at Japan’s Showa University have updated their dental denizen, adding a motorized head and replacing her PVC skin with a more realistic silicon coating. She also boasts speech recognition capabilities and can execute freakishly natural movements, including blinking, sneezing, coughing and, under more unsavory circumstances, even choking. So yeah, basically she’s a sex robot flying under the radar as a dental patient. Nice try, Japan! Did I mention one time I chiseled a wisdom tooth out with a fork because I was convinced there was a piece of melted plastic stuck to it? 100% true story. Yes, I ate plastic. Hit the jump for a video of little Miss Brushnfloss in action.

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Dynamite, STAT!: A Robotic Dental Patient