This is a video of Snake Eyes practicing his ninja-ing in G.I. Joe’s highly sophisticated training arena his backyard while being critiqued by a sun sculpture, a buddha statue, a skull coffee mug, some free weights, and two sets of horseshoes. One thing’s for certain: if you’re a gallon of milk , 2-liter soda bottle or jug of kitty litter, this is NOT the ninja to f*** with. But if you have at least a broken nunchuck and any coordination whatsoever you could easily kill the poor bastard. Unless he whips out his bow & arrow , in which case he’ll probably do it himself. Remember Snake Eyes: Knowing when to quit is half the battle. Hit the jump for a video of G.I. Joe’s latest rejection letter in action.

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Snake Eyes Practicing His Ninja Moves

This is a screenshot of some kid playing ‘Christmas Light Hero’ on the front of his (parents’) house. And I thought I was a crazy Christmas decorator (I am, I wander around the front yard in my bathrobe cackling)! According to the Daily What, Ric Turner, a former Disney ‘imagineer’ and special effects specialist, turned his yard into a game of Guitar Hero, built out of 21,268 lights and LEDs, that plays Eric Johnson’s “Cliffs of Dover.” To program the show a video recording was made of a perfect round of Guitar Hero playing Eric Johnson’s Cliffs of Dover. The timing of all the dots and the light show choreography follow that video. When you play, you watch only the Christmas lights, but the audio you hear is from the Wii, so your flubs are broadcast for all to hear (people in cars can tune 99.1 and crank it up as loud as they want.) Wow, that’s….impressive. Not as impressive as wiring up a homemade ‘Rock Band, Holiday Edition’ using EVERY HOUSE IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD, but it’s not bad for an amateur effort. It is sooooo on, Ric! (I have all the giant inflatables, just sayin’). Hit the jump for the video of the lights in action.

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Guitar Hero Inspired ‘Christmas Light Hero’ Actually Playable On The Side Of A House

Is there anything funnier than tricking a Japanese man into a meeting and then faking the death of everybody else in the room by sniper fire? No. Unlessssss the alleged gunman then bursts in and puts his weapon to the man’s head and pulls the trigger. Seriously, you’re sick, Japan (keep the freaky Hentai coming). Youtube Thanks to Closet Nerd and Harry, whose parents don’t allow them to watch Japanese TV for fear of them becoming morally corrupt.

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Highly Questionable Japanese Sniper Prank

This is a short video from the live-feed at NASA showing the group responsible for bombing the moon celebrating after a job well done. Just watch red shirt there get snubbed by black shirt after initiating a high-five sequence. THEY EVEN MAKE DIRECT EYE CONTACT. Geez, talk about awkward . I’ve only aborted a high-five once, and that was because I knew the guy didn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom. Seriously bro, I’m not touching your junk. Youtube Thanks to Martyn, who has never been denied a high-five BECAUSE HE WILL RIP YOUR ARM OFF AND DO IT HIMSELF IF YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.

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NASA’s Moon Bombing High-Five Fail

Awesome, a lamp powered by human blood . Because this will end well. What if, every time you wanted to switch on a light, you had to bleed? Would you think twice before illuminating the room, and in turn, using up energy? That’s the idea behind the blood lamp, invented by Mike Thomspon, an English designer based in The Netherlands. The lamp contains luminol - the same chemical forensic scientists use to check for traces of blood at a crime scence. Luminol reacts with the iron in red blood cells and creates a bright blue glow. To use the lamp, you first need to mix in an activating powder. Then, you break the glass, cut yourself, and drip blood into the opening. And this, my friends, is how our robotic overlords will read their Kindles at night. And I’ll be damned if I become some robot’s lamp juice. You hear me?! You will never take my blood! Quick, Edward , bite me! DO IT NOW, NANCY! *swoon* God I love your hair. Lamp Runs On Human Blood [livescience] Thanks to Dustin, who has never kissed a vampire (he didn’t like).

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Don’t Tell The Robots!: Blood Powered Lamp

Somebody went and made a baby entirely out of ground beef . Which, funny story: is exactly how God made Adam. Minus the pickle eyes. He used deviled eggs, silly! Can you tell I took a religion class in college? Because I didn’t. I did take a philosophy class though — it was called Morality and Ethics. Yeah, I found out I don’t have any (I stole an exam and got expelled). The Meat Baby [thisiswhyyourefat] Thanks to Tydal and trishna87, who only eat candy babies.

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Meat Baby: A Modern Hansel And Gretel Story

I don’t even know what to say except WTF, HORF and I would totally tape that to my head like a do-rag. Available for $8 on Etsy, this reusable menstrual pad (I can’t believe I’m typing this) is perfect for the Pokmon-loving , environmentally friendly chick with unshaven pits in your life. Not bleach safe or for human consumption. Really?! THEN WHY DID I JUST EAT ONE? Wait, why did I just eat one? My stomach: pump it. The contents: gotta catch ‘em all! Pokmon Menstrual Pad, Yours for Eight Bucks [kotaku] Thanks to Aisha, I think.

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Reusable Pokmon Woman Pad Thingies

Okay so I just noticed I left the “r” out of “your” in that Facebook update but that’s what happens when you stay up till 5 am binge drinking , you know? Also, waking up with strange bruises and an even stranger man in your bed (seriously brah, it’s 10:30 — time for you to go). Anyway, worst burglar ever: The popular online social networking site Facebook helped lead to an alleged burglar’s arrest after he stopped check his account on the victim’s computer, but forgot to log out before leaving the home with two diamond rings. [The victim] told police that someone had broken into her home through a bedroom window. There were open cabinets in her garage, and other signs of a burglar. The victim later noticed that the intruder also used her computer to check his Facebook status, and his account was still open when she checked the computer. Wow, that’s almost as bad as the time I broke into a house and accidentally spelled my name out on the fridge in alphabet magnets. Almost — but this guy is way stupider. Burglar leaves his Facebook page on victim’s computer [thejournal] Thanks to Joshua, nancypantz, Brian and Fally, who ONLY break into people’s places to check their status updates.

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Pathetic: Burglar Stops To Check Facebook On Victim’s Computer, Forgets To Log Out

This is a excerpt from a Facebook conversation (hit the jump to read the rest) between some crazy old lady and who she believes to be her son, but isn’t. I have no idea whether it’s fake or not (I don’t think it is), but that’s not the point. The point is that this a perfect example of why older parents shouldn’t be allowed to operate computers (or motor vehicles, unless they’re driving me to the mall with my friends). And I’m not just saying that because my stepfather walked in to use the computer during one of my more risque webcam shows, but he did. And started dancing. Yeah, it was awkward. But only in the beginning. Hit the jump for the rest of the conversation.

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Why Parents Shouldn’t Be On Facebook. Alternatively: Your Mom Just Friended Me

Melissa Catherine Smith-Means (she is too!), 37, of Gaylesville, Alabama, was arrested for child abuse after dragging her unisex child through a Verizon Wireless store using a kiddy- leash . As punishment, Melissa is going to be leashed and dragged down every aisle of a Best Buy. Just sayin’ — it’s Alabama, folks, they do things differently. Like talk and guns. I’ve lived there, I know . Woman Drags Child Through Verizon Store [techeblog] Thanks to trishna87 and gypsyking, who don’t drag anything but their feet. Seriously, stop being so lazy you two.

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You’re Doing It Wrong!: Woman Dragging Leashed Child Through A Verizon Store