In this 2011 YouTube upload, violist Luk Kmi? shows what to do when your playing is interrupted by a ringing phone, as happened to him during a beautiful performance at an orthodox synagogue in Presov, Slovakia. Kmi? broke off playing for an instant, regrouped, and then improvised a lovely aria based on the Nokia ringtone. Nokia ringtone during concert of classical music ( via Making Light )

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Violist improvs response to ringing Nokia phone

Amazing to think these earrings that dangled special scratch-resistant 45RPM singles from your earlobes never caught on. From the “Now, Why Didn’t I Think Of That?” Department

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Earrings made of 45s

Bender Bound cuts flask-sized cavities into thick, sober (ahem) books in a variety of categories, suitable for hiding in plain sight on a professional looking bookshelf: medical books, law books, cook books, parenting books, even pilot manuals (!). Flask included. Bender Bound ( via Lowering the Bar )

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Professional books with booze flasks hidden in them

Asked to record an audio commentary as a bonus feature for a DVD release of Total Recall, star and former state official Arnold Schwarzenegger apparently interpreted this request as a solicitation for him to watch the film and simply describe what is happening on screen and whether or not he liked it. Because of this, his commentary makes it sound like he has severe brain damage, and it is a wonder to hear–particularly if you’re blind, and always hoped someone would, beat by beat, describe what’s happening in Total Recall. Here, let Arnold Schwarzenegger do that for you:

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Arnold Schwarzenegger Doesn’t Understand Audio Commentaries, Might Be Mentally Ill

Here’s an innovative automotive child-restraint system from 1961. Clearly this little tyke is enjoying her crash-webbing. Wonder why it never caught on? Contest Entry–Easybaby Car Belt, 1961

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Commendably honest ad for failed child restraint system

Julia Suits’s The Extraordinary Catalog of Peculiar Inventions: The Curious World of the Demoulin Brothers and Their Fraternal Lodge Prank Machines - from Human Centipedes and Revolving Goats to Electric Carpets and Smoking Camels is a history of those long-gone, much lamented days when Americans joined fraternal lodges in great numbers, and when those lodges attracted and retained members by subjecting new initiates to horrible, dangerous, violent pranks that often involved some combination of 35 cal blanks and high-voltage electricity. You know, the good old days. The Demoulin Brothers were the top of the fraternal order prank-gadget food-chain, publishing a secretive (but wildly popular) catalog that was distributed to lodge presidents and other mucky-mucks. The catalog featured inventions that could be used to terrorize (and delight) the members by simulating their executions, making them think they were to be horribly burned, and other delights of the simpler era when TV wasn’t yet invented and radio was newfangled and untrustworthy. Suits is a real scholar of those days, and she livens up the many reproductions from the various catalogs with great context-giving notes about the nature of these lodges, reprints from newspapers and magazine articles of the day that give a sense of their prominence and significance, and biographies of the mad geniuses who sold these gadgets for so many years. From the demented copywriting in the catalogs to the fan-letters written to the company by excited lodge leaders who were delighted with the performance of the prank items, The Extraordinary Catalog of Peculiar Inventions is a time machine that transports readers to that gilded age and its highly specialized notions of fun and fraternity. The Extraordinary Catalog of Peculiar Inventions: The Curious World of the Demoulin Brothers and Their Fraternal Lodge Prank Machines - from Human Centipedes and Revolving Goats to Electric Carpets and Smoking Camels [amazon.com]

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Extraordinary Catalog of Peculiar Inventions: awesomely dangerous pranks from the age of fraternal lodges

Here’s a clever mouse-and-USB-stick sandwich, creator uncredited. ( via Neatorama )

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Mouse and USB stick sandwich and garnish

ThinkGeek’s got a set of funny Portal 2 warning-sign coasters, which may serve as a minatory presence in your home for careless visitors who leave rings on the furniture. ( via Red Ferret )

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Portal 2 warning sign coasters

The Wrongulator is a gag calculator that gives incorrect answers to calculations. I’m fascinated by the idea — I wonder if they’ve just got a standard calculator controller in there, and then a secondary system that scrambles the results, or whether it’s a pseudorandom number generator, or what. You’d want it to produce plausible outcomes (5 x 5 = 30; not 5 x 5 = 324527) but who knows if the manufacturer paid attention to this. The Wrongulator is no ordinary calculator, its actually the worlds worst calculator as it never gives the right answer, ever! If your calculator has been exchanged for this one then every single calculation youve entered in it has been wrong. It is perhaps the cruelest practical joke you could inflict on your office colleague and the chances are, without being told, theyll probably never guess.well not before its too late anyway! Mwhahahaha! Wrongulator ( via Red Ferret )

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Wrongulator: a gag calculator that gives the wrong outcome

[ Video Link ] “?~ ??? ?? ?? (Wow It’s mom, but I’m sleepy),” by bobaepapa . The one where she laughs at the sound of tape being pulled off a roll of tape is also worth a view.

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Sleepy Korean baby is mysteriously adorable