I’m on a seafood diet. I seafood and I…where’d it go? This is a video of a black-marble jawfish mimicking a mimic octopus . Just like that classic anti-drug PSA I LEARNED IT BY WATCHING YOU! Parents who use drugs, have children who use drugs. Plus some parents who DON’T do drugs will still have kids who do. And some parents who DO use drugs will have kids who DON’T because they’ll be all, “God, mom’s been on the wine since 10AM again and is getting f***in’ sloppy .” For a good 15 minutes, this black-marble jawfish took the mollusk express, presumably to find food beyond its burrow. As nifty as the fish’s behavior is, the researchers suspect that this isn’t an everyday interaction. From the recent paper in the journal Coral Reefs, “Opportunistic mimicry by a Jawfish”: Since the Black-Marble Jawfish is distributed from Japan to Australia, whereas the Mimic Octopus is restricted to the Indo-Malay region, we think this is a case of opportunistic rather than obligate mimicry. Neato. Of course you can’t rule out the possibility that the fish thought those tentacles were other fish to have sex with. Because my dog humps stuffed animals sometimes and they only KIND OF look like him. The giraffe one not at all. Hit the jump for the video along with a bonus one of two mimic octopi MAKIN’ THE LOVE. Honey, that wasn’t me. But he looked just like you, I swear!

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Not Finding Nemo: Fish Mimicking Mimic Octopus

If you haven’t already seen it, this is a video of a shitty high school science teacher dropping a goldfish in liquid nitrogen , then returning it to water where it “reanimates” itself. The goldfish survived due to the Leidenfrost Effect, which allowed this REAL scientist to dip his hand in liquid nitrogen and it not break off and shatter (follow that link for more info). So my question is this, Special Ed — if you believe in science so much, why’d you use a goldfish instead of your own hand ? I’ll tell you why — because you’re a sissy. ADMIT IT — ADMIT YOU DON’T EVEN BELIEVE IN SCIENCE! *teacher sobbing* “It’s all true — the drama department was overstaffed!” Hit the jump for the that was entirely unnecessary.

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Crappy Science Teacher ‘Reanimates’ Goldfish After Dropping In Liquid Nitrogen

Fish , long thought to make terrible tradesmen (but delicious sticks), can apparently use tools . Rocks are tools, right? “URG!” …Thanks for your input, Grok, but your dingaling is showing . I’m serious, people are starting to stare. Me? I’ve been staring the whole time. Scientists have recently discovered that several species of wrass will pick up clams with their mouths and then spit them at rock “anvils” to smash them open and get at all that yummy slime inside. Mmmm, slimy shit . And to think this whole time I’ve been steaming them to get them to open. Gaaaaaaah, outsmarted by fish again! Hit the jump for a fish demonstrating his clam-crushing skills.

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God, Build Your Own Aquarium: Fish Use Tools

You ever wanted to see what a clear turtle looks like? Just ask Giotto, the fifth ninja turtle. “There aren’t five!” Yes huh, you just can’t see him. While the other four were rolling around in the ooze, he was actually drinking that shit . Now he’s invisible and has even seen April O’Neil shower IN TEH NUDE. These are a bunch of animal specimens preserved by Iori Tomita. Oh, but first he makes them clear and dyes their bones and cartridge so they almost look like x-rays . Speaking of which… *dons x-ray specs* HA — nice out-of-season novelty Easter boxers, bro. IT’S SEPTEMBER. Originally, the method of making transparent specimens enzymatically turning the protein transparent, dyeing the bones magenta and dyeing the cartilages blue was established for scientific purposes to study the skeletal system. Taking this a step further to refine the form and coloration of the specimens requires time and experience. I create transparent specimens as pieces of work that help people feel closer to the wonders of life. People may look at my specimens as an academic material, a piece of art, or even an entrance to philosophy. There is no limitation to how you interpret their meaning. I hope you will find my work as a “lens” to project a new image, a new world that you’ve never seen before. WTF is an “entrance to philosphy” (besides not this) aside, if you live in Japan you can actually buy some of Iori’s smaller specimens (fish, shrimp and squid) at a couple stores, but the larger ones (lizards, birds, turtles) are only available at his exhibitions. Plus expensive. Not that you need one anyways because it would just 1. gather dust or 2. get eaten when you’re drunk. Just sayin, I had a college roommate with one of those baby sharks in a jar he got at the beach. That thing tasted like shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. Hit the jump for a ton more pictures to round out the anatomy lesson.

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What In The…?: Clear Preserved Animals

This is a picture of recently discovered Protoanguilla palau , an eel that evolved into its current form around 200 million years ago, at the beginning of the Jurassic period . No word if they remember seeing the elusive Ceratosaurus’ mating ritual , but I’d pay good money if one could describe to me in detail. “You’re sick, GW.” Ha, I know — and I haven’t been taking my medicine. They found that the new species, Protoanguilla palau, had traits that matched those of the earliest eels. Things such as a large head, fused skull bones, and a small number of vertebrae made it a closer match to eels from 100 million years ago than modern eels. The researchers then analyzed the eels’ DNA and found that it dated back to 200 million years ago, near the beginning of the Jurassic period. This was around the time when the supercontinent Pangaea broke into two, and the sea teemed with a variety of life. Are you thinking what I’m thinking? Spicy eel rolls. Put a little dollop of wasabi on those things and mmmm mmmm mmmm! “Hey GW — you should really try the blowfish liver.” Haha, nice try buddy — don’t those give you the runs? “Something like that.” Good thing I already have them — bring on the blowfish liver! Living Fossil Eel Found in Palau [thirdage] Thanks to wok, who would not hesitate to stir-fry that mamma-jamma with some water chestnuts and bamboo shoots.

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Dinosaur Era ‘Living Fossil’ Eel Discovered

Neat post about an experimental plastic substitute made from fish scales over at Brian Lam’s ocean-themed blog Scuttlefish . So far art student Erik de Laurens “has made not only goggles, but eye-glass frames, drinking cups, and a wooden table with a fish scale inlay” from fish scales.

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Swim goggles made from fish scales

This is an artist’s rendition (INVENT A TIME MACHINE ALREADY, GOD! ) of Leviathan melvillei , a 12-million year old sperm whale that used to snack on other whales thanks to it’s powerful jaws and foot-long teeth . ZOMG — imagine the damage you could do at In-N-Out with those things! “This is a pretty exciting discovery,” says Erich Fitzgerald, a vertebrate paleontologist at Museum Victoria in Melbourne, Australia. Leviathan represents “one thing we don’t have in the oceans today — a macropredator, a hypercarnivorous whale.” Modern sperm whales feed largely on invertebrates such as giant squid, but have been known to feed on fish and other creatures as well. The extremely robust, deeply-rooted structure of Leviathan’s teeth strongly suggests that the creature fed on large, presumably struggling bony prey like sharks do. The whale was named in honor of Herman Melville, the author of Moby-Dick , which, no lie, was actually based on ancient tales (I’m like thousands of years old) of my white whale. So technically it should be called Leviathan gwmegapeen , but I’ll let it slide. JUST THIS ONCE. Ancient Whale + Killer Shark = Hypercarnivorous Whale [wired] Thanks to Mr Geek, Christian, Matty, Grace, Jennaiii, Divo, and Sam K, who would have trained the whales to be ridden and looted Atlantis.

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Suck It, Kraken!: Giant Whale Eating Whale

Love sushi but wanna eat that shit while you’re driving ? Steer with your knees . Or buy a $5 Sushi Popper. Mmmm, sounds fresh! Each Sushi Popper includes eight pieces of precut sushi and a bit of wasabi wrapped inside an airtight tube. After opening the top of the tube, diners can add soy sauce from a small stick affixed to the packaging, and grab their first piece of fish. They reach the next piece by pushing up on the bottom of the tube. Sushi Poopers are delivered frozen and have to be thawed for an hour or two before consumption. They can be ordered directly online and come in a variety of popular flavors like ‘Mystery Fish’, ‘Improperly Handled Seafood’, ‘Food Poisoning’ and ‘Great, Now I Feel Bloated and Gassy’. *licking lips* Okay I think I just swallowed a pube. Product Site via Now Available: Sushi Push Pops [gizmodo]

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Nice Package: Sushi In Push-Pop Form

There are good ideas and there are great ideas . This is a f***ing terrible one. Nuking the oil leak to cover that shit in rubble and seal it off. Plus birth Godzilla! (which, admittedly, I am for) A plan proposed to detonate a nuke to seal off that troublesome oil well is gaining support with each of BP’s failures. The Russians apparently used the tactic five times between 1966 and 1981. They went four for five. Will it ever happen? According to an anonymous source at the Los Alamos National Laboratory in New Mexico — y’know, the guys and gals who created the Bomb in the first place — no. “It’s not going to happen,” continuing on with “Technically, it would be exploring new ground in the midst of a disaster — and you might make it worse.” Listen: I know James Cameron may be some kind of expert on submersibles and underwater filming, but if you’re considering atomic warheads you’re gonna need me on the team . Because I’m an atomic expert. Just sayin’, one time I nuked a hotdog for three minutes before it exploded. Nuking the oil spill, a ‘crazy’ plan that’s gathering steam [dvice]

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Smart Thinking: Okay Forget James Cameron, Let’s Just Nuke That Oil Spill! (Yes, Seriously)

This full-sized blue whale website comes to us from the Whale and Dolphin Conservation Society that urges everyone to “EAT MOR CHIKIN”. Kidding, those are the Chick-Fil-A cows. Damn, now I want a sandwich . Ladies? Anyway, the website was designed to give the average computer user a sense of awe for just how large the sandwich you better be making me should be. Crazy, huh? Those whales are huuuuuuge. And as a guy whose had his fair share of BBW lovers: motion of the ocean, baby. I don’t even know what that means, but I just bought a sailboat! Website Thanks to Shelby, who is a special f/x artist and could make even me look cool. On fire . While exploding. Riding a shark.

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Frickin’ Huge!: Full-Size Blue Whale Website