This is a fake-ass video of two quantum levitating hover cars racing around a little track inspired by the Playstation classic Wipe’Out . People are passing it around like it’s real, but it’s not — it’s fake. I assume they’ll announce a new Wipe’Out game in the next couple weeks. Ooooooooooooor maybe it’s real. Maybe scientists actually do spend their time making sketchy videos of meticulously reconstructed video game hover cars and race tracks with a giant ‘ ‘WIPEOUT’ printed right in the middle. *eyerolls so hard I lose a contact* Seriously folks, you really can’t believe everything you see. Half the time it’s just aliens playing tricks on us with laser beams! Hit the jump for the worthwhile but fake as shit video.

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Smells Viral: Quantum Levitating Toy Racecar Track

Researchers at Dartmouth College have developed a metric to apply to altered images to address how much Photoshopping a picture has undergone, in an effort to provide more truth in advertising and prevent unhealthy body image issues. Hey, I’m 5′4″, 240-lbs and cool with that. Farid and Eric Kee, a Ph.D student in computer science at Dartmouth, published their research this week in the journal National Academy of Sciences. The tool would work on a rating scale of one to five. Farid and Kee created a base metric by analyzing and statistically measuring results from various before-and-after photos. They then correlated these findings with a study group that was asked to rank the amount of photo alteration on a scale of one (very similar) to five (very different). This numbered metric could then be algorithmically applied to photos of, say, celebrities and models to reveal just how much photo-manipulation took place. You want to know how much photo-manipulation takes place? I’ll tell you — TONS. It’s true, the last unaltered celebrity photo was actually taken in the 90’s. THE 1890’s. It was sepia-toned. Tool Reveals Which Celebs, Models Have Been Photoshopped [mashable] Thanks to Pat, who looks stunning even without photo manipulation. I’M SAYING YOU’RE HANDSOME, BRO.

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The Shadows Are All Wrong: ‘Photoshopped’ Algorithm

This is series of paint splatter superheroes by artist Arian Noveir. Now before you go running off to the comments to complain there’s no way you could splatter paint like that, don’t. They’re DIGITAL . Although you could probably recreate them IRL with the right amount of masking. You know, if a person put their mind to it they could actually accomplish a lot with some paint splatter. One time I even delivered a baby on a bus with nothing but my own two hands and a little paint splatter . Just kidding, it was baby juice and I passed out as soon as I saw the woman’s vagina, but you get the point. The point is I’m no doctor and it’s not always cool to pretend you’re one. Hit the jump for a bunch more including Wonder Woman, the Hulk, Hellboy, Darkwing Duck (jk jk), Spiderman, Wolverine, Thor and Superman.

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Eye Candy: Paint Splatter Superheroes

Note: The high-res versions of the landing sites are HERE (Apollo 12), HERE (Apollo 14) and HERE (Apollo 17). You know how your grandma is still convinced the moon landing never happened and it was all faked by Hollywood ? She’s a smart lady, I can see where you get it from. This is a series of high-res photos from NASA showing the Apollo 12, 14 and 17 landing sites and the imprints left by humanity there. Granted they were all faked in the Photoshop building at Area 54, but they’re still fun to look at. So yeah, if you don’t like them you should probably consider take a long walk off a short pier into the sea. “Of Tranquility?!” Dude — you should f***ing blog. Hit the jump for a couple videos because videos are worth a thousand pictures or something. At least a hundred.

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You Can Even See The Tire Tracks!: NASA’s High-Res Pictures The Apollo Landing Sites

This is a video of Vilnius (the capital of Lithuania) mayor Arturas Zuokas crushing an illegally parked Mercedes in a tank . Except that’s not really a tank because tanks have treads (but not all things with treads are tanks!). That right there is what we call an urban assault vehicle. I assume the whole thing was staged, but the point that Mayor Zuokas was trying to make is that illegally parked cars WILL NOT BE TOLERATED. Prostitution, maybe , but not if they’re gonna wear those shorts where their buttcheeks are all hanging out the bottom. Those are gross. Still, I’m not sure running over a single car in a wheeled tank-thingy is really the most effective way to deter illegal parking. No, the best way to deter illegal parking is to hide under the perp’s car and slit their Achilles tendon when they come to get in. Now that shit — that shit’ll teach somebody a lesson. Just not one about learning to walk again, that’s the physical therapist’s job. Hit the jump for the lamest monster truck rally I’ve ever seen and I’ve seen them put on in a neighbor’s backyard before.

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Should’ve Used A Monster Truck: Lithuanian Mayor Crushes Illegally Parked Car In Tank

Remember Monday’s ‘Internet Explorer Users are Dumb-Dumbs’ study ? Well, unshockingly to anybody who’s familiar with the internet, is was faked . Also, 2-Pac’s death. Hey, it’s cool, Pac — I ain’t mad at cha. A number of media organisations, including the BBC, reported on the research, put out by Canadian firm ApTiquant. It later emerged that the company’s website was only recently set up and staff images were copied from a legitimate business in Paris. It is unclear who was behind the stunt. Hoho — falsifying a study with unsurprising results — damn boy, you got us good! Oh, this just in: hoaxers 4x more likely to get their noses broken when discovered. Also, a brawl breaks out at a local Wal-Mart — details at 11! Internet Explorer story was bogus [bbcnews] Thanks to Bender, Jerry and bb, who each have a sockful of pennies with a hoaxer’s names on them.

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Shocking: Internet Browser Study Was A Hoax

J&D’s, the same company that brought us bacon mayonnaise , bacon lip balm , bacon envelopes and bacon popcorn , is back at it, this time with huffable bacon-flavored oxygen. But, before I go any further, TOMORROW IS APRIL FOOLS’ DAY — don’t let anybody fool you. So on that note, this is probably fake. Oooooooor it could be real. God knows I’ve already seen even crazier shit this week (a stray cat f***ing a dog on a leash). Allegedly the product was inspired by these huffable chocolates and is shipping soon for $9. *reading product site* “95% pure Himalayan oxygen”. FAKE! FAKE AS HALF THE TITS IN HOLLYWOOD. Still, if it turns out not to be you should definitely only use it after igniting the spray. You know, for that authentic smoked bacon flavor. Kidding, I want you to melt your face off. News report and link to iffy product site after the jump. Feel free to fool your friends (they’re all dicks anyways).

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FINALLY — Huffable Meat: J & D’s BaconAir

Space isn’t actually colorless , I just made that up so people who only read the headline go spread misinformation and hopefully lose bets. But for the rest of you, nothing but the facts . My penis could feed an entire village for 18 months. Plus NASA uses Photoshop to manipulate shots from the Hubble Space Telescope to make us think space is actually cooler than it really is (SPOILER: I’ve been there, it’s a shit-ton of nothing). This time lapse shows how the image of NGC 3982–a spiral galaxy 68 million light-years from Earth, in the Ursa Major constellation–was made using seven grayscale images captured using three of Hubble cameras. The processing job took 10 hours of scaling, rotating, aligning, color processing and missing pixels and artifacts restoration. Scientists have to choose how to represent this information in a way that we can observe directly. Sometimes they will use a natural representation , which is very close to what we would see if we zoomed there inside the Enterprise. Other times they will choose representative color , which helps them see invisible features of the object–like those that can only be captured in infrared or ultraviolet light. And sometimes they show the image in enhanced color , a hyperrealist mode that brings a lot of hidden, subtle details. There’s 10-hours of edting packed into a 2-minute video after the jump, that talks you through the process. Basically the style of Photoshoppery depends on a particular photo’s intended use. Which, to the best of my knowledge, ranges from ‘look cool’ to ‘look really trippy’. Unfortunately, for those of you who were hoping for some insight, there was little talk of how they faked the moon landing, but my guess is in a giant underwater tank. “Like…the kind with a cannon?” *kicks you in the nuts so hard you cry sperm* Hit the jump for the informative video.

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Because Space Is Actually Colorless: How NASA Uses Photoshop TO CREATE LIES

This is a 30-second video of four dudes playing shuffleboard badminton with lightsabers special-effected in over their racquets. It would have been cooler if the editor had turned the shuttlecock into one of those lightsaber training balls like Luke uses on the Millennium Falcon , but it’s obvious somebody wasn’t thinking. “Her-her, did he just say turn a shuttlecock into balls?” I did, and I’m going to turn yours into a f***ing lizard if you don’t start acting your age. Hit the jump and get your recreational Force on.

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The Force For Recreational: Jedi Badminton

This is a fake-ass commercial for Super Harmony, an eHarmony knock-off for people who are or want to date superheroes/villains (NOT ugly people ). I tried applying, but they were all, “dammit GW, you’re more of a demigod than a superhero .” And I was all, “I LIKE DUDES IN TIGHTS!” The video isn’t particularly knee-slapping, but it did have a couple moments. What it didn’t have was Emma Frost, Rogue or Supergirl in the dating pool, making it far less a pool you’d actually want to get in, and more of a lukewarm hot-tub filled with superdudes daring each other to take their bottoms off. *dives in off patio lounger* Hit the jump for 2:30 of superdatin’.

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Super Harmony: eHarmony For Superheroes