I have brown eyes . And they’re romantic as f***. Men and women have actually gotten lost in these peepers for days . Kidding, they’re like gazing into two twin @$$holes. And now a California doctor claims he could turn them blue with a quick 20-second cosmetic laser surgery. *starts saving* Sike — I like my eyes just the way they are: brown and so lazy sometimes one doesn’t even open . The laser energy removes the brown pigment, or melanin, from the top layer of the iris, and the blue eye colour emerges over the following two to three weeks. However the procedure - which Dr Homer has developed over 10 years - is irreversible because the brown tissue cannot regenerate. ‘They say the eyes are the windows to the soul,’ he told ktla.com. ‘A blue eye is not opaque, you can see deeply into it, while a brown eye is very opaque. I think there is something very meaningful about this idea of having open windows to the soul.’ No, Dr. Homer, there isn’t anything meaningful about the “idea of having open windows to the soul.” Besides, blue eyes aren’t open windows anyway! Having your eyelids removed is. Doctor claims he can turn brown eyes blue (but he can’t change them back again) [dailymail] Thanks to Robin and alex, who, like me, though this whole article was about b-holes at first.

Go here to see the original:
Laser Surgery To Turn Brown Eyes Blue

This is a series of eyeball closeups taken by Suren Manvelyan . Why anybody would want to take a bunch of freaky macro eyeball pictures is beyond me, but I suspect Suren is trying to steal souls. WHAT THE HELL KIND OF POTIONS ARE YOU MIXING, WIZARD?! Hit the jump for a ton more ookiness.

See the rest here:
Windows To The Soul: Eyeball Closeups

John Matthews is a man. A man who used to have a little worm eating its way around his eyeball before a doctor PEW PEW PEWed that little SOB with a laser . Lasers: what CAN’T they do? That was a trick question, lasers can do everything. John Matthews loves to hunt turkeys and travel to foreign places like Mexico. During one of those adventures, something crawled inside his body. When two dark spots appeared in his vision and his eyesight became a little hazy, he headed to the doctor. Soon after making the diagnosis, Dr. Folk armed himself with a laser and put the worm in the cross-hairs. John was awake the whole time and said he was thinking, “Hurry up and kill the thing. Good luck shootin’, doc…I saw something wiggling and I asked if the worm was wiggling. The doc said, ‘Yes.’ I said, ‘I can see it.’” Dr. Folk said, “When you hit it with the laser, it got very upset. As upset as a worm can get, I suppose…The thing was just thrashing around violently. It would be like one of those titan movies or something.” The worm is dead. It will decompose over time. Now, John must do computer exercises to strengthen his eye. His vision has improved, but may never return to normal. My God that’s disgusting. As a matter of fact, I’m *this* close to popping both my eyes out with the spoon I just used for yogurt so I don’t ever have to experience that. Seriously, what could possibly be worse than a worm eating your eyeball? Having square eyeballs? F*** that sounds painful. Worm eats Cedar Rapids man’s retina [thegazette] Thanks to FDSY, who’s from Cedar Rapids and is convinced at least half the populace has worms in their brains. I’ve never been there but I believe it.

View original post here:
Don’t Read Before Lunch: Man Finds Worm In Eyeball, Doctor Blasts It To Death With Laser

A-ha! It’s really true too, once you see him he’s nearly impossible to un-see . Thankfully, I have a little secret: booze . Higher proof the better. Okay, now pour it in your eyes. Can’t see him anymore, can you? Good. How many fingers am I holding up? If you answered, “none, but is that you touching my butt?”, yes, it is. Also, doing some squats wouldn’t kill you. You can’t unsee Bomberman in BioShock 2 [joystiq] Thanks to GuamOtoko, who once thought he saw Mario on the cover of God of War III but it turned out to be he was tripping his face off.

Originally posted here:
I Thought They Looked Familiar: Bioshock Big Daddies Actually Bomberman In Disguise

LED eyelashes are exactly what they sound like: LEDs that attach to your eyelashes and light up to freak everybody out. I would wear them but my eyes are perfect the way they are. Read: eyepatched . YAAAAARR! Now, somebody put my cutlass in my hand and point me toward the liquor store: I’m feeling plunder-y. Hit the jump for one more shot of the ridiculousness.

See more here:
LED Eyelashes: No, That’s Not Weird At All

I know for a fact the government can pull images from a person’s brain because they’ve been probing around in my dome for years, messing with the delicate ecosystem up there. And one time when I was being interrogated I saw a picture of a dinosaur in an agent’s file folder, SO I KNOW. Anyway, apparently they’ve decided to make the technology public knowledge. Having modeled how images are represented in the brain, the researchers translated recorded patterns of neural activity into pictures of what test subjects had seen. To construct their model, the researchers used an fMRI machine, which measures blood flow through the brain, to track neural activity in three people as they looked at pictures of everyday settings and objects. As in the earlier study, they looked at parts of the brain linked to the shape of objects. Unlike before, they looked at regions whose activity correlates with general classifications, such as “buildings” or “small groups of people.” Once the model was calibrated, the test subjects looked at another set of pictures. After interpreting the resulting neural patterns, the researchers’ program plucked corresponding pictures from a database of 6 million images. Soon, everyone will have a photo printer in the back of their head to print off worthwhile images they’ve seen. Me? I already have one. Don’t believe me — check this stack of pictures. What? Don’t act like you’ve never seen a dinosaur penis before! Brain Scans Reveal What You’ve Seen [wired] Thanks to Anit, who can read minds like comic books: with incredible difficulty.

Read more:
Scientists To Pull Pictures From Your Brain