This is a video of a little girl pushing a toy car full of people off a cliff and then laughing maniacally at the carnage. *wiping tear* Supervillains — they just grow up so quick, you know? It seems like only yesterday she was eating boogers. “That was this morning.” She’s nasty! Hit the jump for a bright future in evildoing.

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The Future Of Evil: Little Girl Laughs Maniacally

Wow, what a picture . Somebody must’ve opted for the deluxe package at Sears Portrait Studio! A study at the University of Washington’s Institute for Learning and Brain Sciences took a sample of 64 18-month-old babies, who were all tested individually. The experimental test had the babies sit on their parents’ laps, facing a remote-controlled humanoid robot. Sitting next to the robot was Rechele Brooks, one of the researchers on the study. Brooks and the robot (controlled remotely by an unseen researcher) would then engage in a 90-second skit, in which Brooks interacted with the robot as if it was a child, asking questions like “Where is your tummy?” and “Where is your head?” The robot would in turn point to its different parts. The robot would also imitate a few arm movements, like waving back and forth. The babies who watched this skit looked back and forth between the robot and Brooks as if “at a ping-pong match,” said Brooks. After the skit, Brooks left the room, leaving the baby and the robot alone. The robot would then beep and shift slightly to get the baby’s attention, and then turn to look at a nearby toy. In 13 out of 16 cases, the baby would follow the robot’s gaze, suggesting that the baby sees the robot as a sentient being, that what the robot looks at might be of interest to the baby as well. Babies at that age distinguish between, say, a swivel chair’s movement and a person’s movement, and will only follow the person. But in following the robot, the study suggests that the baby has decided that robot is a human being. I’m not gonna lie, that doesn’t even sound like a well-designed experiment. What it does sound like is child abuse. But what do I know? I’m just a man who was raised by super-intelligent beings from another galaxy to come save your sorry asses from the robots when the time arises. And you better hope I’m not on the john at said time. Because I sit there until my legs go numb and I’ll be in no shape to fight robots for at least 20 minutes. 30 if I decide to make a snack after because I just cleared some room. In New Study, Babies Think A Silvery Robot Is Human, As Long As It Acts Friendly [popsci] Thanks to Mih0, Jeff and Kelly, who’s babies will never mistake robots for people because they’ve got a little something I like to call Anti-Robot Intuition.

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Study: Babies Mistake Robot For A Human

Earth, wind and fire tornadoes . This is what the apocalypse looks like. “Oh really? Then where are all the make-believe killer robots you’re always crying about, GW?” Above, you dumbass! A ‘fire tornado’ has been caught on camera in the Brazilian municipality of Aracatuba, caused by strong, dry winds that fanned wildfires. A whirlwind of flames spiralling several metres high danced across fields, bringing traffic to a halt on a nearby road, before it disappeared. The phenomenon followed weeks of drought which have sparked brush fires across the country. I mean fire tornadoes seem pretty cool and all, but you know what would be even cooler? Fire taquitos . BOOM — an hour later I’m making my own fire tornadoes to battle Poseidon’s toilet-bowl whirlpools. Who will win? Not whoever has to use the bathroom next, that’s for sure! Because they’re definitely losing. Brain cells, motor skills, you name it. Hit the jump for a short video of the apocalypse in action.

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Toto, I Don’t Think We’re In Kansas Anymore I’m Pretty Sure We’re In Hell: Fire Tornadoes

I don’t know, but it doesn’t sound good . I better finish my rocket double-time before this thing goes and swallows up the solar system. WHO’S COMING WITH ME? I have room for three. Plus snacks. Operators of the world’s largest atom smasher on Friday ramped up their massive machine to three times the energy ever previously achieved, in the run-up to experiments probing the secrets of the universe. The European Organization for Nuclear Research, or CERN, said beams of protons circulated at 3.5 trillion electron volts in both directions around the 17-mile tunnel housing the Large Hadron Collider under the Swiss-French border at Geneva. The next major development is expected in a few days when CERN starts colliding the beams in a new round of research to examine the tiniest particles and forces within the atom in hopes of finding out more about how matter is made up. Not to put a damper on your weekend, but we’re all as good as dead. So you know what that means — drink like you’ve never drank before!* *Geekologie accepts no responsibility for alcohol poisoning but will take all the credit if you manage to score some awkward, drunken sex. Atom Smasher Sets 3.5-Trillion Volt Energy Record [foxnews] Thanks to hybridsix, who promises to sabotage the machine with more bread. Smart, hybridsix, way to buy us some time.

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What Does That Even Mean?: Large Hadron Collider "Sets 3.5-Trillion Volt Energy Record"

I don’t want to ruin the premise of this little video for you but basically the infamous Star Wars word crawl from the beginning of all the movies starts falling to earth and the Enterprise has to come save us. Woops . I’m not good at keeping secrets either. Youtube Thanks to bowzee, who may or may not be Bowser’s feminine brother.

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We’re All Gonna Die!: Star Wars Vs. Star Trek

This is a video of a bunch of different robotic hands showing how dexterous they are at bouncing balls , gripping things, throwing things, catching things and a bunch of other fun stuff robots shouldn’t be allowed to do. I mean, what is this, robot gym class? Next thing you know they’re gonna be whipping your ass with a wet towel in the locker room. WHICH IS ONLY FUN WHEN TWO GROWN MEN DO IT. Am I right guys? Love that game. Youtube Thanks to Chris and Aroinak, who once shot a bot in Reno and didn’t even stick around. Way to go guys, there could have been more.

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Robotic Arms Have Come A Long Way. A Long, Much More Deadly Way (Hold Me)

Wow, they’re not even trying to make them look cute anymore. The Japanese born ROBOTOPS is a construction robot whose name is spelled in all caps because IT MEANS BUSINESS. The killing business. The four-legged, two-armed robot is actually a kind of automated mobile crane with 29 functioning joints for picking off humans, and of course the occasional piece of construction material. Using a high quality three-chip CCD camera, the robot can be operated remotely for particularly dangerous jobs. And no, I didn’t alter that quote at all. Finally, people are starting to get the picture. It’s comforting to know I’m not the only one that sees a problem here. Seriously, Japan — you know I love you (manga, sushi, worn panty vending machines), but this shit has got to stop. Because if not, well, Godzilla . Just sayin’, we share a special bond (read: intercourse). Japanese construction firm unleashes insectoid robot crane on humanity [dvice] Thanks to cougar78, Aaron and John, who know the only good robots are the little guys from Batteries Not Included . Am I right? No, that was a test and you all failed.

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No, No, No: Japanese Killer Construction Bot