Bill Gates, having decided computers have run their course or whatever, has decided to focus his efforts on reinventing the toilet to aid the some 2.6 BILLION PEOPLE IN THE WORLD with no reliable source of sanitary shitter. Wow, that actually does sound pretty noble. Granted nowhere near as noble as Baron GW von Intertubes, but what does? Water hygiene and safe waste disposal are two of the biggest causes of infant mortality in the developing countries. Gates and his foundation hope to create inexpensive toilets to vastly improve the living conditions of millions of people. It may seem like a silly subject but it’s one that could save lives around the world. Today, 40% of the world’s population does not have access to flush toilets. One billion people defecate in the open. Each year, 1.5 million children die each year from diarrhea, many of which are preventable with improved sanitation. HOLY SHIT DYING FROM DIARRHEA ASIDE, they should invent one that muffles farts while they’re at it. Because let’s face it, no matter how far I manually spread my buttcheeks, they always make a sound. TRUST ME. But not the government — they’ve been lying to us about aliens. Hit the jump for a short video about the project that says doodoo in the beginning.

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Bill & Melinda Gates Fdn To Reinvent Toilet

Hey — this rainbow tastes like pet fur and dust bunnies! What happens when you let seven Roombas (each with a different colored LED strapped to its head ) loose in a room for a late-night cleaning sesh ? This. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS, LARRY. The creators, IBR Algorithm Group, explain that the Roombas were all running at the same time, hence the collision points in the painting. Personally, I don’t want to be killed in my sleep for being too lazy to run a vacuum, so I’ve never owned a Roomba. My brother has one though, and I haven’t heard from him in weeks. You do the math. “10 x 2 = 30″ Okaaaaaaaaay, maybe we’ll let a calculator do the math next time. Hit the jump for a couple more shots of the art is dead.

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Taste The Rainbow: Roomba Pattern LED Art

This is a designer shower head that was on display at Milan Design Week 2010 that looks like a deer’s face. Water comes out of it’s mouth and is perfect for the outdoorsy type and furries. But not me. I want a shower head that looks like a woman’s face. I also want to pour green food coloring in the hot-water heater so it look like she’s vomiting on me. What?! I don’t judge you for your fetish, Mr. Cuckoo Clock F***er! FREAK YOU’RE A FREAK! Okay maybe I do. You know, this post really took a turn for the worst about midway. Deer Stag Shower Head [ohgizmo] Thanks liquid tension, now pour this food coloring in yourself and let’s get this party started!

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The Outdoors, Indoors: A Stag Head Shower

Remember the chocolate weaponry we featured awhile ago? Well now the same company is manufacturing weapon soap. Probably from the same molds as the chocolate . I’d still wash my mouth out with it. Also, b-hole. Don’t act like you’ve never lost one of those little seashell soaps up there! The company currently sells handgun, grenade and brass knuckle models and prices range from $10 to $35, with giftsets coming beautifully packaged in authentic gun cases. Wow, can I sell products or what? And by products I mean drugs. Meet me in the frozen food aisle. Hit the jump for a smattering of the offerings and another link to the product site.

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*PEW PEW* All Clean!: Soap Weaponry

Google toilet paper : made with 100% virgin pulp and available in Vietnam. Per a questionable translation of the text on the bag: “Very long, soft, smooth. Of high vacuum, because you always!” HIGH VACUUM, OF COURSE I ALWAYS! Dingleberry free, just sayin’. This Google’s made from 100% Virgin pulp, not chrome [engadget] Thanks to wes, who only wipes with Charmin because the dude’s a bear.

Link:
Google: Perfect For Searching AND Wiping

The $200 Solar Power Shower can heat up to 8 liters of water to 140 Fahrenheit in as little as two hours, provided it’s outside in the sun and not in your basement . It’s a lot more sophisticated than a simple camping solar shower, because this one mixes that 140 water with cool water from the garden hose, giving you plenty of toasty warm water at just the right temperature. Impressive, but I don’t really have a need for a solar powered shower. I do, however, have a need for that chick in the picture. Seriously, I’m getting hungry. HIYO! Solar Shower heats water in two hours [dvice]

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Solar Shower Provides Hot Water In 2 Hours

This is soap shaped like brass knuckles . It’s equally suited for punching yourself in the taint or fighting off would-be lovers in the prison shower. Which, miss you Big Bear . Brass Knuckle Soap Allows You To Punch Up a Good Lather [gizmodo] Thanks to pstone, who made me his bitch.

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Prison: Don’t Drop The Soap Knuckles