If you didn’t already catch it this weekend, this is the 2-hour director’s cut of Star Wars: Uncut , the 15-seconds-at-a-time fan sourced (each fan was responsible for making a different 15-second scene) Star Wars: A New Hope remake . Now I didn’t have time to watch the whole thing this morning , but from what I gathered a lot more scenes were shot in people’s garages than I remember from the original. Granted I can’t say I’m surprised. Get it? I’ve never seen the original! Hit the jump for two hours of Star Wars on zero budget. Bonus points if you manage to watch the whole thing at work. Suck it, the man!

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Homemade: Fan-Sourced Star Wars Reboot Finished

Go to Google, type in ‘do a barrel roll’. The page barrel rolls. This isn’t rocket surgery, folks. Google and Google (this one should auto-roll for you) Thanks to Tarkin, Boogie Jon and bb, who don’t use Google for anything but reading the autofill responses when they’re bored. That…wow, that’s some serious f***ing boredom.

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Wheeeeee!: Google’s ‘Do A Barrel Roll’ Trick

This is a real game in development featuring Super Mario Bros. BUT WITH PROTALS!!!!11 (Protals are the new portals btw). It will eventually be released for free but you can’t play it yet because, well, that’s life. Oh shishi, you want some game facts? COO BRO I GOT THAT. All the source code of the game will be available after release The game will have mappacks, which will be downloadable from ingame. Users most likely won’t be able to publish maps directly, but will be able to send them in and we’ll add them for everyone to use. The primary maps will have a story and some portaly puzzles. What kind, well, we’ll figure that out as we go Level editor will be embedded in the game so you can edit the level while you play Original SMB levels and Lost levels will be included Simultaneous Multiplayer Looks promising. And I don’t say that about just any game. Yes, yes I do. You know how they always make a super shitty video game to accompany every kid’s movie that comes out? I’ve played all of them. Aaaaaaaaand I regret it. Hit the jump for a video of the gameplays.

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Super Mario Bros., Now With More Portals

This is a series of oldschool video game favorites re-imagined with Criterion Collection box art and make-believe details. I posted all the box art after the jump, but you can follow the link to read what “extras” would be included with each game in the fake collection because somebody fleshed this shit out waaaaaaaaay too f***ing far. Hit the jump for eleven others, including some Chrono Trigger, Super Mario Kart, Sim City, Super Metroid and Starfox.

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I Approve Of This: Classic Video Games Reimagined With Criterion Collection Box Art

This is a short commercial for the Nintendo 3DS release of ‘ Ocarina of Time ‘ starring Robin Williams and his daughter Zelda, WHO READS GEEKOLOGIE and was named after Princess Zelda in 1989 after only the first two games had come out. Thankfully, he’d only played the first at the time and not ‘ The Adventure of Link ‘, because there’s no way he could have played that one and not named her ‘Seriously, F*** That Last Palace’. I still haven’t beat that shit. Hit the jump for the commercial, along with a 4:00 interview of the two talking about why she was named Zelda, in which Robin clarifies it’s not because of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s wife (although that is where Miyamoto originally got the name).

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Robin Williams & Daughter Zelda (Named After The Princess) Do Ocarina Of Time Commercial

Mario videos — everybody loves them, right? “I hate them.” YOU SHUT UP — I HATE YOUR FACE. The first (short) video is of the original Super Mario being played with Portal technology . The second (longer) video is a speed-run of Super Mario 3 with all the music played via “real-time jazz accompaniment”. The third video, which I thankfully caught and deleted prior to posting, was a sessy webcam video of me I didn’t realize I’d recorded. Trust me, leaving it up would brought the entire site down in an intense flash of pure, unbridled sensuality. Oooooooor me digging between couch looking cushions for a snack. Read: I found and ate a furry Gusher. “You nasty.” Still had its juice in it, just sayin’. Hit the jump for the videos.

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Mario Double Feature!: A Mario/Portal Mashup And Mario 3’s Music Played Acoustically

Remember earlier this week when I posted a video of Super Mario Bros. with updated sound effects and you were all like “LAME!” “donkeyballs!” “GW suuuuuuucks”? Well here’s another one created by sound-designer Jake Kaufman with a bunch of other games just to spite you . YOU HEARD ME! My therapist says it’s best to not retaliate when somebody hurts my feelings, but you know what I told him? Nothing, I choked him out with his neck tie and stole a diploma off the wall. *puts feet on desk* The doctor is IN. *packing briefcase* Aaaaaaand back out. Hit the jump for Tetris, Contra, The Legend of Zelda, Pac-Man, Mega Man, Donkey Kong, Breakout, some bicycle game, some Olympic game, and some racing game.

Originally posted here:
More Games With Updated Sound Effects

This is a video from the same makers as the ‘If God of War was a Wes Anderson Movie’ and ‘ Inglourious Plummers ‘ flicks. It’s the story of Link and Zelda as told as an 80’s coming of age film ( The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Say Anything , etc.). Admittedly, it was pretty well made and they even roughed up the footage to give it that “holy shit the VCR is eating my tape” feel. WHICH YOU YOUNGER WHIPPER-SNAPPLES CAN’T EVEN APPRECIATE. Also, car windows that aren’t electric . You know how long it took me to perfect a roll-up that would look electric to hot chicks watching from the outside? Forever. Literally, I never got it. I think they all thought I was masturbating. Hit the jump for the worthwhile video. Tingle’s in it, just sayin’!

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Zelda Reimagined As 80’s High School Movie

Note: Video is after the jump because they’re probably gonna remove it for copyright violation but hey — at least there’s a picture on the front page so you can make-believe what happens. This is a cute cartoon made by a Russian beer-chip manufacturer or something. It features one of the warriors from Contra battling it out in a game of Tetris . Now I don’t want to ruin it for you, but there’s a surprise ending. It makes your computer explode with candy. Kidding, dreams really don’t come true. Hit it for the video.

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There Can Be Only One: Contra Vs. Tetris

Alright, I’m taking bets — who will be the victor ? If you answered, “GW in a f***ing monster truck “, congratulations, you won. Something. Not my v-card though. Head-on crash test: 2009 Chevy Malibu vs. 1959 Bel Air [dvice] Thanks to James, who would have crushed both those vehicles with a Sherman tank. You get all crushy on those things, James!

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Who Will Win?: 2009 Chevy Malibu Versus 1959 Chevy Bel Air Head-On (Apply Directly To The Forehead) Crash Test