Seen here playing with himself in more ways than one, a man contemplates his next move on Hammacher Schlemmer’s $300 Vertical Chess Set. In case you couldn’t tell, it’s a wall-mounted chess set . Sure you could probably make a table-top version out of a heavily modified Connect Four, but let’s not kid ourselves: it’s not worth investing the time. Besides, you know what’s cooler than playing vertical chess? Playing horizontal hide the sausage . Know what I’m saying? I’m saying hide pieces of hotdog in the couch and watch your dog try to get at them. Product Site via Vertical Chess Set [laughingsquid] Thanks to Lane, who prefers checkers. Me? Skyward Sword.

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Zero Footprint: A Fancy Vertical Chess Set

This is Monster Chess, a 12′ x 12′ (that’s feet, not inches) robotic LEGO chess game made with over 100,000 blocks for a total build cost of ~$30K (that’s thousands, not kelvin). The pieces are all controlled via laptop and I wouldn’t hesitate to body-slam a rook if it got out of line. Same goes for the knights . But not the king — he reminds me of Stephen Hawking. Hit the jump for a long-ass video of the game being played.

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Wow: $30,000 Robotic LEGO Chess Game

Chess on rollercoasters is a phenomenon allegedly started by another xkcd cartoon (which you can see by clicking the link or hitting the jump). It’s probably old as all hell and I should be beat mercilessly between your breasts as punishment. Go ahead, I can take it. *BWUBWUBWUBWWUB!* I deserved that. Oh, and you might want to keep those out, I feel an old streak coming on. Holy shit — hands painted like animals ! Hit the jump for the cartoon and several others, including one with a bikini and one with some Jenga action going on because I roll deeper than the Marianas Trench.

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It Adds Excitment: Chess On Rollercoasters

For over five hundred dollars, I really wish this Star Wars chess set were less ugly. Or maybe it’s not even ugly that bothers me, but the lack of imagination. I know that pawns are all supposed to look the same, but there’s an entire universe of odd aliens out there and they’ve got to use the same hunched pilot figure eight times? Previously: Star Wars cupcakes look a little chewy - Boing Boing Gadgets Russian Star Wars posters - Boing Boing Gadgets Star Wars on Betamax - Boing Boing Gadgets Video: Star Wars guests on Spanish Muppet Show - Boing Boing Gadgets Star Wars' “Imperial March” scraped across a hard drive - Boing … No Regrets: LEGO Star Wars “Thugs for Life” tattoo - Boing Boing … Star Wars Shaggin' Wagon for Sale on eBay - Boing Boing Gadgets 3D Star Wars kites - Boing Boing Gadgets

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Star Wars chess set replaces imagination with silver and gold