So yesterday the feds busted up Megaupload, the “50-million+ daily visits and 4% of all web traffic” file-hosting website for SURPRISE! copyright infringement (among other things). Then hacker collective Anonymous, displeased with the fed’s operation, decided to go on a website killing spree, taking down the FBI, Department of Justice, Recording Industry of America, Motion Picture Association of America, BMI, Universal Music, and other related sites with quickly orchestrated distributed denial of service (DDoS) attacks (basically pounded a server with access requests until it shits the bed). Oh God please don’t do Geekologie next. So, yeah — no word what’s gonna happen to RapidShare, Box, FileSonic, FileFactory, uPload, Wupload, 4shared, Oron, Badongo, DepositFiles, Uploading, zShare, FileServe, MediaFile, MediaFire or Hotfile. But me? I already know what’s gonna happen to me. I’m gonna get rich making and selling mix-tapes out the trunk of my car . Come over quick and bring boomboxes! Feds Kill Megaupload [gizmodo] and Anonymous Goes on Megaupload Revenge Spree: DoJ, RIAA, MPAA, and Universal Music All Offline [gizmodo] and Feds Shutter Megaupload, Arrest Executives [wired] Thanks to everyone who sent this in, the majority of which expressed a real concern with where their next porn-fix was gonna come from. IT’S THE INTERNET PEOPLE, NOT PRISON (not yet anyways).

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Feds Shut Down File-Hosting Giant Megaupload, Anonymous Goes On A Website Killing Spree

The Photoblocker is a beer bucket from Norte beer that has a camera flash sensor that causes the bucket to fire its own flash , effectively ruining any photos taken in its direction. Because, as the company puts it, “what happens in the club, stays in the club.” Great news, really (I just puked in a stairwell). The device actually exists and works. It’s been planted in a few regional bars and photoblocked pictures were still uploaded with the subjects well protected. Savvy club owners would do well to look into ways of acquiring more like these…However, there doesn’t appear to be concrete plans to bring the device to North America. There are two videos of the bucket in action after the jump, which seem to encourage infidelity and promiscuous behavior, neither of which I can condone. That said, I would let somebody try to take a picture of me sitting in another dude’s lap just to see it work. Ready? Now pretend like we’re kissing! *click* It didn’t go off, did it? “Nope, waitress took the bucket to refill a couple minutes ago.” Sooooooooo…do we have to get married now or what? Hit the jump for the ads.

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Norte Photoblocker: The Beer Cooler That Prevents Unwanted Photos (But Not Pregnancies)

This is a for-real video of a guy who poses as a 15-year old girl online (been there, done that amirite?!), gains the interest of some pedo , and agrees to meet them in real life. Then dude shows up dressed as Batman and calls the pedo out. This is a video of that happening. It’s hands down better than Batman Forever and Batman & Robin combined. Hit the jump for the skeez.

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Batman Pulls A Chris Hansen, Trolls A Predator

Facebook just got outed for including (non Girl Scout ) cookies that have the potential to track a user’s movement across the interwebs even when signed out of the site . I…feel violated. Get it? I just sat on a dog toy! When Australian programmer Nik Cubrilovic first blogged on Sunday about how Facebook logout didn’t seem to actually, uh, log out, the company went into damage control mode, insisting that “Facebook does not track users across the web,” which was pretty funny given that Facebook has a tracking feature its CEO literally calls “Facebook Across the Web.” The company also said, “logged out cookies… are used for safety and protection…” Except it turns out one cookie wasn’t used for “safety and protection,” as a Facebook engineer has admitted to Cubrilovic now that the press storm is subsiding. One cookie, “a_user,” continued to report your user ID back to Facebook after you logged out, until you shut down your browser entirely. The cookie was only visible to Facebook, but the site could have used it to track your visits to other sites if it wished, since a great many websites feature “Facebook Connect” widgets that load content from facebook.com — transmitting cookies to Facebook each time they do so. Oh shishi Facebook, you bein’ bad! *calling Zuckerberg* Hey Zuck — it’s me, the Geekologie Writer. THE GEEKOLOGIE WRITER, DAMMIT, DON’T ACT LIKE YOU DON’T KNOW WHO I AM! Huh? No Y, it’s with an I-E at the end. Listen Zuck, let me cut to the chase — I’m calling about something really serious today. I need you to float me $10-million. Why You Never Really Log Out of Facebook [gawker] Thanks to Joe and JoeLickASac, who, wow, two different Joes on one tip, what the chances of that happening?! “Not small enough to be worth mentioning.” Oh.

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Faceybooks: Never Not Tracking That Ass

Note: WTF video after the jump. Seen here pounding out a drum solo on some lady’s bongos chest (please, a little maturity), Khunying Tobnom practices the (not so) ancient art of breast enlargement by slapping. What the — is anybody really buying this?! I heard the secret was getting motorboated by a slovenly blogger. Khunying has been performing this non-surgical technique for more than 20 years, and her claim is that the slapping shifts body fat from one area to another and the kneading works excess fat towards the breasts. [But what if you knead too much into one and not enough into the other?!] In 2003, breast slapping was officially approved as a natural alternative to plastic surgery. At least for now, this one beautician is the only person in the world who knows the secrets of breast, face and buttock slapping, which she inherited from her grandmother. One day when she a teenager, her grandmother saw her applying some miracle cream to her breasts in hopes that they would grow. She told her to stop wasting her time and money and rub them till it hurt. [WTF?!] She allowed her grandmother to slap her breasts a few times and douse them with ice-water, which resulted in a growth by 4 inches. Eventually, she mastered the techniques on her own. Not gonna lie, one time I got punched in the forehead and it swelled up too. I know, weird how that works. But then it turned purple-greenish-brown. Not how I like my taytays. Wait, let me rephrase that — not how I like women’s taytays. Mine? I’m kinky as f***, I’ve even tie-dyed these puppies before. Hit the jump for a video of Khunying in action and, inevitably, a bunch of dudes in the comments offering their services for free.

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Super Iffy Thai Breast-Slapping Enlargement

Looks like a normal coloring book page, right? Something a parent might reluctantly hang on the refrigerator while mentally reminding themselves to take it down before any guests can see it? WRONG! It’s been dosed with drugs. *tears open mail licking everything* Back in February, corrections officers received information that the drug Suboxone (aka Buprenorphine) [a narcotic used to treat opiate addiction but often used recreationally] was being channeled into the Correctional Center through inmate mail. The tip led to a full investigation. During the second week of February, a mail room officer discovered mail containing a coloring book page. The page had an Orange substance blotted on it that looked similar to watercolor paint. Investigators confiscated the page and sent it to the Cape May County Prosecutor’s Office Laboratory for testing. The page tested positive for Suboxone. Pretty clever guys, but you’ve got to get up preeeeeetty early to trick an old trickster the Cape May County Correctional Center. Now — I’ve never actually been to prison before (only jail), but I don’t know how I’d feel about doing drugs in there. Making potty beer sure, but I’m afraid anything else might make me go crazy. Like dropping acid and locking yourself in a hall closet. You’re just not the same after that. Are you? I’m not. WHO SAID THAT?! Me. Me who? You did, this is you. GAAAAAAAAAH! *fighting to stab myself* Hit the jump for one more coloring book page.

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I’ll Admit, That Is Pretty Clever: Prison Inmates Sent Drugs As Dosed Coloring Book Pages

Uh, is that a dude with tits? Microsoft , working with the federal gubment, successfully raided a number of web-hosts around the country, bringing down a bot-network of compromised computers they believe are responsible for as much as 40% of all spam emails . Weird, because my box is still packed with boner-pills. Did I say box? I meant butt. That’s where I keep my stash. “Shutting down Rustock could put a huge dent in spam worldwide,” reports CNet. Indeed, tech security giant Symantec estimated last year that Rustock was responsible for 39% of the world’s spam. “The shutdown is one of the rare victories against cybercriminals who use botnets, or herds of compromised computers, to wreak havoc on the internet,” writes VentureBeat. “It shows that technology can be used to perpetrate cyber crime as well as to hunt down cyber criminals.” Alas, “At the moment, it’s safest to say Rustock has been made inactive, rather than having been taken down,” according to DigitalTrends.com. “The estimated million infected zombie computers are still out there, and if Rustock’s creators are wily they might be able to regain control over some portion of them.” Great, now where am I supposed to go for cheap drugs? “The ghetto.” The ghetto?! But it’s dangerous to go alone! “Here, take this.” *looking* This is a sign that says ‘ROB ME’ with a bunch of racial slurs. Spam Network Shut Down [wallstreetjournal] Thanks to Rooble, who, got any testosterone pills?

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Microsoft, Feds Bring Down BotNet Spam Ring, Boner Pill Emails Drop Almost 40%

According to a story by NPR’s This American Life , the 125-year old top-secret Coca-Cola Classic recipe was accidentally leaked in the photo accompanying a 1979 Atlanta newspaper article about the soda giant, but nobody noticed it until now. You’re going down, Coke! Well, as soon as this last batch of bathtub gin finishes fermenting. THEN IT IS ON. Same goes for you, Fanta! You think I won’t make some bomb-ass tastin’ grape soda? I LIVE FOR THAT SHIT! And while companies like Pepsi have deduced the general ingredients on their own, none have unlocked the “Merchandise 7X flavoring” that gives Coke its unique taste and bubbly burn. “The company has always said, and as far as I know it’s true, that at any given time only two people know how to mix the 7X flavoring ingredient,” Mark Pendergrast, historian and author of For God, Country and Coke told This American Life. “Those two people never travel on the same plane in case it crashes; it’s this carefully passed-on secret ritual and the formula is kept in a bank vault.” The recipe: Fluid extract of Coca: 3 drams USP Citric acid: 3 oz Caffeine: 1 oz Sugar: 30 (unclear quantity) Water: 2.5 gal Lime juice: 2 pints, 1 quart Vanilla: 1 oz Caramel: 1.5 oz or more for color The secret 7X flavor (use 2 oz of flavor to 5 gals syrup): Alcohol: 8 oz Orange oil: 20 drops Lemon oil: 30 drops Nutmeg oil: 10 drops Coriander: 5 drops Neroli: 10 drops Cinnamon: 10 drops Alcohol, huh? No wonder I like it so much. Of course, I’d like it even more if half the can was bourbon. Which, at least the way I drink them, actually are. You think I can’t pour Maker’s Mark into a Coke can? Oh I can pour Maker’s into a Coke can . It’s called a steady hand funnel. Remember: where there’s a will (and drinlkling problem), there’s a way. Plus a long history of drunk in publics. OCCIFER NOOOO! Is This the Real Thing? Coca-Cola’s Secret Formula ‘Discovered’ [time] Thanks to The Superficial Writer , who used to have the secret family recipe to Bush’s Baked Beans but lost it in a drinking contest. Well technically I stole it during a drinking contest, the point is it’s mine now. MY HEART NEVER HAD IT SO GOOD.

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Coca-Cola’s Secret Ingredients Discovered?

Apparently Microsoft’s search engine Bing has been stealing search results from Google and Google recently ran a sting operation to prove it. DAMN — BUSTED, GATES! (Sorry, but we’re all gonna have to hop the fence). Google first smelled a rat when misspelled searches on Bing would bring up the same spelling corrected results as a Google search, even though Bing didn’t attempt to correct the misspelled search term. Then they noticed a stronger than expected correlation between the top 10 results for many searches. So they ran a sting, where they created “synthetic” searches by adding a random letter and number series to various web pages. A Bing search for that series returned no results until it was manually added to Google’s search results, at which point it would magically appear in the Bing search. Bing hasn’t actually denied Google’s claim, saying only that they use “multiple signals and approaches” to create their results. Haha, “multiple approaches”. Well obviously one is “use Google’s results”, what are the other ones? “We don’t actually have any other ones.” WELL THROW SOME GEEKOLOGIE LINKS IN THERE, SHIT! Google: Bing Is Cheating, Copying Our Search Results [searchengineland] (ultra in-depth article explaining the findings) and Google claims Bing is cheating by copying their searches [dvice] Thanks to Will C, buck and Amy, who don’t steal anything but hearts. What in the — I thought I felt dead inside!

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They Took Everything!: Google Accuses Microsoft Bing Of Stealing Search Results

Terminators are some of the scariest kind of robots. They shape shift , can look like humans , and are hard as hell to kill. That’s way no bueno. Plus there’s a bunch of them. Can you imagine if the future had regularly sent back more than one? We’d be long gone! You’d be beating one in the face with a shovel when another one sneaks up from behind and HELLO! — you’re getting violated. Thanks but no thanks, T, that’s for my lover and family physician only! Anyway, this is a LEGO Terminator bust (different from this one ) designed and built by Martin Latta . From a LEGO-building standpoint, it’s amazing. From an oh God please don’t kill me standpoint I just soiled myself and punched through my computer monitor. Thank goodness I’ve memorized how to use my computer without looking! Open > iTunes > Play ‘Jurassic Park soundtrack’. http://www.google.com “dinosaur erotica”. Wait — am I back in the right window? Hit the jump for several more shots, including some with his eyes lit up. Yipes!

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DO NOT LIKE: Terminator-800 LEGO Bust