Seen here about to choke some poor f*** out, Jusui-Kun is a robotic bear pillow that paws at a person’s face if they’re snoring, encouraging them to roll over and stop cutting the z’s or whatever. TOO BAD I DON’T SNORE. God, make something for busting ass in your sleep. Okay, it’s more of a “gentle tickling,” according to the bear’s creators. The key is to get the snorer sleeping on the pillow to move his or her head from side to side. Jusui-Kun has a built-in mic to detect the sleeper’s snoring, while an equally cuddly hand monitor detects blood oxygen levels, letting the bear know when to issue one of its loving face swipes. Oh man, can you even imagine explaining this thing to your girlfriend when she comes over AND YOU’RE IN BED WITH SOME ROBOTIC BEAR TICKLING YOUR NUTS? “…Why would it be tickling my nuts?” Why wouldn’t it be — because you wanted to know what it felt like! Hit the jump for a short video of Chokey the Bear in action.

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Robotic Bear Pillow Claws At Face To Prevent Snoring

Karmasheetra is a 19.99 (~$32) bedsheet that shows you how to GET. IT. ON. Before you go running out to buy one though: you have to have two people . Otherwise you’re just doing yoga . Just slap your ass, hands and knees on the numbers corresponding to the particular position you’ve chosen, and presto!, you’re not disappointing your lover for once. Kidding, of course you still are . I actually bought one before reading the directions and thought you were supposed to play it like Twister. I wound up banging the back of my own knee. I’m not really proud of it, but I DID just tell you, so obviously I’m not really that ashamed either. Hit the jump for one more shot and a link to the product page.

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Karmasheetra: Color-Coded How To Get It On

This is a giant-ass Millennium Falcon beanbag chairbed. I would sleep on it. But I’d also eat on it, because I’m a disgusting fatbody. True story: when I was doing my quarterly bed laundry this weekend I found a turkey drumstick, half a piece of pizza (sans crust), two Fruit Roll-Ups and an unopened pudding-pack in the tuck at the bottom. I had a feast . “You’re sick.” No, I’m full is what I am. “OF SHIT!” *dancing* I know but I’m trying to wait till I’m home to go! Millennium Falcon Beanbag of the Day [geeks.thedailywh.at] Thanks to Jaded (ditto) and aaron, who sleep face down on the carpet like nature intended. Nature, or alcoholism? Pass out on my sofa with your shoes on and get a complimentary schlong Sharpie’d across your forehead on Faceybooks and Tweeter

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Ever Made Love In Less Than 12-Parsecs?: An 8-Ft Millennium Falcon Beanbag Chairbed

Did anybody else know there was a bed in that thing ? Because I didn’t. Of course, you could write a small pamphlet about all the the things I don’t know. Sike! They’d all fit on one side of a Post-It . Anyway, some talented craftsman is selling the Tardis pull-out bed he made for his son because he’s grown up and doesn’t want to sleep in a phone-booth time-machine spaceship anymore. ????? YOU’RE NEVER TOO OLD TO SLEEP IN A PHONE-BOOTH TIME-MACHINE SPACESHIP! Are you, Doctor? Doctor? *poking with a Sonic Screwdriver * Uh-oh. I am personally endorsed by Sir Richard Taylor of Weta Workshop, for being a multitalented artist including restoration, of just about anything and exquisite one off handmade models. Sir Richard has my models in his collection in the foya of Weta Impressive. Unfortunately for your kids, bidding is already up to $3,200 New Zealand (~$2,400 US) with eight days bidding remaining. So yeah, looks like it’s back to sleeping in the barn for them. Haha, you thought I didn’t know?! One time I saw little Jimmy with a piece of straw in his hair and figured it out! Just kidding, he told me he sleeps in the barn. Doctor Who Tardis bed handmade [trademe] (with a bunch more pictures and info about the actual construction/features) via Badass Homemade Bed of the Day [thedailywh.at]

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Up For Auction: Dr. Who TARDIS Murphy Bed

The Zip Bed is a bed designed with zip-up covers. Why? I have no idea . I assume it has something to do with bed bugs. Italian furniture design company Florida has created the perfect bed for those mornings when you just want to grab a coffee and run out the door. All that you have to do is simply get out and zip it up - no more making your bed in the morning. At night, you just unzip it and climb back in. If you like the snugged-up feeling, you can even be “zipped-in.” An Italian furniture company named Florida? Why not Florence ? Also, I could have sworn these were invented forever ago and sold under another name. What were those things called? Oh right, SLEEPING BAGS. Which, fun fact: I used to be so afraid of ghosts raping me at night I would only sleep in a sleeping bag with just my head poking out. It’s true — I would sweat so badly eventually the interior fabric would start to mold. But Capser never got that ass. Bed-making is a breeze, with the Zip Bed [gizmag] Thanks to David and towel monster, who are comfortably sleeping anywhere provided the lights are on and the room is set up in accordance with the laws of feng shui.

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Zip-Bed Never Has To Be Made, Only Zipped

Anybody seen my Power Glove ? I can’t perform without my Power Glove on . Whew, found it . Now — I want you to pretend like I’m a game cartridge that won’t play. Two more shots of the “wait — where are you going?!” after the jump.

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I Put On My Robe And Game Genie Hat…

This is some Russian man’s giant CPU collection laid out on the bed he pretends to have sex in. Great job, guy. I collect baby teeth bottle caps! Largest private collection of CPUs has been discovered upon one Russian guy has posted a message on a forum. His message says “here is my humble collection for you” and then listed something more than one thousand of different types of computer processors he collected. There are ones from the old times and as well as modern ones, the lost and seemed never coming back relics of Soviet Russian genuine processors that preceded Intel world dominance and many other interesting findings he had. Damn, that’s one tough looking geek. I love his pose, it’s like he’s whispering, “Which one of you ladies can I make queen of my central processing kingdom? Any takers? I don’t know if you saw, but I also have a canister vac .” Hit the jump for several more shots of the “in Soviet Russia, C processes U”. *swish*

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Are Those CPU’s In Your Bed Or Are You Just Happy Your Robotic Love Doll Exploded?

Let’s not kid ourselves: you can’t watch mixed martial arts without getting aroused. So why not move those amorous feelings to the bedroom with a cage fighting bed? I can’t think of a good reason (well, besides the $1250 price tag). Pillow fight! Crafted from poplar hardwood poles, MDF frame with steel undercarriage bed supports. With the use of actual fencing, 9 gauge 6 core centers, foam padded rails and synthetic leather covers, this will last forever, just like the real deal. MDF Stairs include replica diamond plating Throwdown Anvil detail. Looking to get this bed for someone other than the little guy or gal? In addition to Twin, we have Full, Queen and King size as well! Oh man, this reminds me of the first time I walked in on my roommate having sex. Get it?! Because he was with another dude. Plus there was a ref. Product Site Thanks to BooGT, who [insert something about a rear naked choke-hold].

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Let’s Get It On!: MMA ‘Throwdown’ Caged Bed