McDonald’s restaurants (if you can even call them that) in Australia, having suffered from a recent spat of robberies (who the f*** robs a McDonald’s ? Taco Bell or GTFO), have teamed up with security firm SelectaDNA to install sprayers above its doors that will douse robbers with an invisible mist of DNA . Why? To make them glow under blacklight for police identification. Wait, WHAT? The newly introduced DNA will then seep harmlessly into his or her skin for two weeks (and clothes for six months) allowing the police to reveal the culprit using UV light. The spray is both invisible and odorless, but even if the hapless highwayman notices the deoxyribonucleic acid rain cloud, SelectaDNA assures that its chemical concoction is “virtually impossible to remove.” Making matters worse for the offender is that each DNA sequence is unique to the location to which it was installed, meaning a successful forensic identification is 100% admissible in court. Basically, if you get caught in this stuff, you’re screwed. No word if the DNA will cause you to mutate into a supervillain, but brobro in the picture there does look kinda like a Star Wars character, so that’s something. Not something I’d be willing to rob a McDonald’s to achieve, but I’m also smart enough to only rob Burger Kings. *putting on cardboard crown* NOW LEAD ME TO THE ROYAL TREASURE ROOM. Australian McDonald’s Now Spraying Thieves With DNA [escapistmagazine] Thanks to Sore_Dong, who may or may yes have permanently injured his unit. Smooth move buddy — your DNA spraying days are OVER.

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Rob An Australian McDonald’s, Get Hosed With DNA

Australian transportation authority VicRoads has signed a deal with Warner Bros. to be able to issue DC Comics superhero license plates . Why? I dunno, apparently there’s a demand for this sort of thing down under. Also: Vegemite and boomerangs . I want a Batman one with ‘RBN 069′. Superman is already muscling his way into the lead in terms of early customer interest, but the vehicle license plates on offer also include Supergirl, Batman, Green Lantern, The Flash and Wonder Woman. “The superhero plates are great value and start at just $200 for customers to upgrade a general issue plate with the design, or $404 to choose their own 3×3 [letter and number] combination as well,” he said. Great value?! $200 and $400 isn’t a great value — I’ve paid less FOR AN ACTUAL CAR. Sure it was a giant lemon, but you wanna know what I did? I made lemonade . Kidding, I pushed it over an embankment into a river. Hit the jump to see the Batman plate.

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Australia Issuing DC Superhero License Plates

Some peen-loving jokester (God, aren’t we all? ) in Victoria, Australia managed to draw a really crappy looking wiener on one of the camera lenses of a Google Street View car. As far as wieners go, it’s not a very good one. On a scale from 1 to 10 it’s like a 2 ( is that…supposed to be a penis? ) Still, you can cruise around on Street View and see it all over the place, the best shot of which I screencapped HERE because I have the brain of a 13-year old. Get it? I make my little brother come up with all my material! Hey little bro, I need something clever to say about this Google Street peen — what you got for me? “Promise to type whatever I tell you?” Come on — you know how much I hate thinking, of course I will. I’m a pecker, I eat my own boogers! I’ve never seen a girl naked and whenever I play my music loud I’m actually masturbating. Google Street View via Someone Drew A Penis On The Google Maps Street View Camera [buzzfeed] Thanks to Aaron, who agrees a penis worth drawing is worth drawing right.

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Aaah, There’s Wieners Everywhere!: Someone Drew A Peen On A Google Street View Camera

You know that saying, “more than a mouthful’s a waste “? Yeah, me neither. And apparently neither does Australia. The country has decided to ban smaller looking breasts from adult content because of pedo-y concerns. The ban (RC) on small breasted women in adult publications has been made by the Australian Classification Board allegedly on the grounds that such images could be construed as child pornography, even where those publications comply with American law and keep certification that performers are over 18. Female ejaculation has been banned on the incredible grounds that “the depictions are a form of urination which is banned under the label of ‘golden showers’ in the Classification Guidelines” and/or “Female ejaculation is an ‘abhorrent’ depiction.” Notably here male ejaculation is completely legal under the same guidelines, attracting an X rating in Australia. First of all, breasts of all sizes are awesome. And secondly, what’s up with this female ejaculation thing? Talk about a double standard. You outta be ashamed of yourself, Australia! And to think Britain used to use you as a giant penal colony. What happened? Millions Of Extra Sites To Be Censorsed As Australian Gov. Bans Small Breasts, Female Ejaculation [inquisitr] Thanks to Korey and Tofu Butcher, who’ll take all the breasts they can get, regardless of size or number of nipples.

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Discrimination!: Australia Bans Small Breasts

The idea behind the KeepCup is so simple that it at first seems pointless: it’s a reusable to-go cup, designed specifically for coffee. But the novelty is its height: small enough to fit under the nozzle of a barista’s espresso machine, while larger, taller to-go cups have to be filled by coffee poured from the paper cups in which it was made, defeating the whole point. I mean, whatever, right? It’s just a short plastic cup. But if you use it every day, perhaps eventually the energy expenditure in producing the KeepCup will be less than that used to produce the paper disposables. One cute tip: Coffee variants are embossed on a silicone band around the outside of the cup, making it possible for you to highlight your preference with a permanent marker. Would you like to buy one? Okay, well, you can’t. Not yet. But you can sign up on their site to get information when the first production run is complete; the first wave should hit in June. And it might help if you’re in Australia. That’s where the company is based. [via Graham Readfearn/Courier Mail ]

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KeepCup, which is basically a plastic cup