This is a video of a Boeing 767 making an emergency landing in Warsaw after its landing gear failed to deploy. There were 230 people on board , but nobody was injured. Soaked in shit and piss, yes. It appears the Polish Lot aircraft, en route from New York, circled the city to burn up fuel and allow emergency crews to gather in preparation for the landing. Hey — how many Polish pilots does it take to land an airplane? Polish pilots — that’ll be the day! But seriously, sweet-ass landing. I actually have a spoon that looks like a little airplane and I can’t even get a spoonful of beans & weenies in my mouth without poking an eye. Hit the jump for the I’ve experienced rougher landings WITH landing gear.

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Boeing 767 Emergency Landing Sans Wheels

Seen here soliciting a wave from a young passenger, a member of a Paris airport’s holographic staff welcomes flyers aboard their flight . GOOD — I hate those real workers. *stuffing little brother in suitcase* In Paris, one major airport is piloting a test program that replaces gate workers with holographic projections that look just like the real thing — and they don’t ever seem frustrated about that extra carry-on you tried to sneak on board. When it’s nearly time to bust out your boarding pass, a living, breathing boarding agent can push a button to fire up the holograms, which then do part of the work, welcoming passengers and providing information about the status of the flight. The projections, which are beamed onto a human-shaped piece of plexiglass, look and sound like the real thing. No word if the holographic workers are permitted to grant free first-class upgrades, but you better believe I’m gonna drunkenly yell at one until it does. Hit the jump for a video demo.

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Dammit Jem, I Said I Wanted An Aisle Seat!: Holographic Airline Staff

Just like THIS GUY who did the same thing with a Lamborghini , Dan Reeves spent nine years building a RV-7A airplane kit in his basement. Theeeeeen had a contractor dig up his yard and remove a basement wall to pull it out. Why? Because his wife is a dream-crusher , that’s why. To be fair, Dan only really wanted to build the thing, then install a glass floor in the living room so he could admire his handywork from above. Unfortunately his wife nixed that idea, so out it came. OMG — A GLASS FLOORED LIVING ROOM WITH A PLANE BENEATH?! That would have been the shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit . Well, provided the basement isn’t all junky looking. Or have a grown son living in it with a penchant for playing duck duck wiener. *ahem* Me. Wait… Hit the jump for a video news report, because this is news somewhere (I posted it, didn’t I?)

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Man Builds Plane In Basement, Has To Dig Up Yard And Destroy Wall To Get It Out

Seen here looking suspiciously like Rodney Dangerfield’s lovechild, a man explains Samsung’s experiment to drop 200 paper airplanes from 36,500 meters (119,750 feet or ~22 miles) above Germany. Each plane contains a Samsung SD card with messages uploaded from people who visited their website. Mine reads, “SUCK IT, ALIENS!” Allegedly planes traveled all the way to Sydney, Australia; Khabarovsk, Russia and Bangalore, India, although I suspect they’re actually all at the bottom of the ocean or in a shark’s stomach. The feat was performed with the intention of demonstrating just how “magnet-proof, shock-proof and waterproof” the SD cards are, but I suspect it’ll actually demonstrate just how small and hard to find they they are. Just sayin’, you know how many memory cards filled with nude Myspace-style mirror shots of myself I’ve lost? TENS. Plus a couple external hard drives. And at least one briefcase of Polaroids. Please note: if you find one of the planes you’re encouraged to contact Samsung with your info yell ‘HOLY SHIT IT’S A BOMB!’ and call the police. Hit the jump for a video of the planes being released.

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Paper Planes In The Sky, I Can Go Twice As High: Samsung Drops SD-Card Laden Paper Airplanes From 22-Miles Up

Dogfight as in airplane battle, not dogfight as in I’m a peenerless d-bag who likes watching pitbulls bite each other. Which, fun fact: if I’m ever diagnosed with terminal cancer I’m coming for you. Me making you chew on a gun aside, this is an awesome jet-fighter scene created by Flickr user -Mainman- , who — need a wingman? For anyone who’s interested, the cockpit is somewhere around 1/2 scale (maybe a little smaller) and the F-15E and MiG-29 are 1/100 scale The flares are a couple of Exoforce fiber optic tubes with Lego light bricks on the far end. They worked out better than I expected - I love the lens flare I got with them. Incidentally, with the exception of the HUD display photoshopped in, there’s not a single non-Lego object in this photo Freaking awesome. Reminds me of when my brother and I would set barstools on their sides and sit in them while pretending we were fighter-jet pilots. No, no it doesn’t. Because that was actually a train. Now shovel some more coal in the wastebasket and let’s CHOO CHOO our way to a house fire! -Mainman-’s Flickr Gallery via Enemy in sight [brothers-brick] Thanks to The Bucktooth Ninja, who — Jesus man I could see you coming a mile away with those things. Get some tooth blackout or something.

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Bogey At 2 O’Clock!: Awesome LEGO Dogfight

This is a video of two enema bags in an airplane doing a nosedive so the dog in the back experiences weightlessness. I can’t tell if he liked it or not, but my guess is no. Dogs, as a rule, like their feet on the ground and their tongues on their privates. And can you blame them? You can’t. But you can blame them if they sleep with you at night and toot in their sleep. DAMMIT CHLOE YOU’RE GIVING ME NIGHTMARES! Hit it for the short video.

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Dogs Love Trucks Planes: Weightless Dog