Not The Worst Thing I’ve Heard: Dork Anthem

This is a song called ‘The Dork Anthem’ by two cats named Dave and Brian. Personally, I find the term dork offensive , but that’s just me and I’m official the judge of these things. Geek, sure, but dork ? That’s derogatory. Like not calling me by my proper title: Geekologie Writer, The Handsome Well Endowed. Youtube Thanks to Rusco, who throws geek parties all the time and sleeps with lots of women. Unless he’s married or has a girlfriend, in which case he doesn’t. ;) (Your secret’s safe me with me)

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Not The Worst Thing I’ve Heard: Dork Anthem

DO NOT WANT: Scrap Metal Alien Queen

This is a giant Alien queen statue made out of scrap metal . She’s scary as hell and will give you the worst kind of STD if you try making love to her: penis tetanus . NO LOCKBALLS FOR ME THANK YOU VERY MUCH! The recycled sculpture is an assembly of over 4000 individual parts, who prior to being consolidated into this sculpture where constituent elements of automobiles, boats, televisions and basically anything that had steel worth recycling and weighing in at 550kg (1,210 lbs) and standing tall at 2.4m (7′10″) this alien queen will definitely make her presence felt anywhere she goes. With all this intricate detailing and ingenuity put into this design it’s no surprise that the sculpture sells for 4500 (~$6,100), which is pretty reasonable for a work of art of this calibour. You know what — maybe I was being too harsh. I think I’ll take the scrap queen out for a date after all. STRAIGHT TO THE RECYCLING CENTER! You gonna make me rich, queeny! Hit the jump for several more of the no thank you.

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DO NOT WANT: Scrap Metal Alien Queen

Not Necessary: Cat Hammock Coffee Table

The Cat Hammock Coffee Table was created by Case-Real and is a glass -topped magazine receptacle with a wicker-ish hammock for your feline companions beneath. It’s cool, but your cat would be just as happy sleeping under any coffee table. Or in an empty soda box. Hit the jump for one more shot of the hammock in use.

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Not Necessary: Cat Hammock Coffee Table

US to build glass cube embassy in London, Rubik not impressed

Looking kind of like the world’s biggest Rubik’s Cube , the new ultra high security US embassy in London will feature a 100 foot wide moat to keep away would be attackers, and a one billion dollar price tag. That’s more than either of the new embassies in Iraq and Pakistan cost, where security concerns are much higher. The new digs are needed because the neighbors near the current bunker like place in ritzy Mayfair, are ready to revolt if even tighter security measures are introduced near their fancy homes. The cube will be near the Thames in the gritty industrial area behind Battersea Power Station, a district currently known mostly for its gay bars. It has the benefit of falling just outside London’s infamous congestion zone, where you need to pay about $10 each day just to drive in. US diplomats have racked up almost $50 million in unpaid congestion charges driving to the current place. Designed by Philadelphia based architect Kieran Timberlake, the new embassy is designed to be carbon neutral, and is expected to actually return power to the UK grid. Other than the moat, the designers are being tight-lipped about security features. Still, the layman in me wonders about the thinking behind using a glass structure. Perhaps all a future spy would need is lip reading lessons and a good pair of binoculars. What’s that line about people in glass houses throwing stones? Groundbreaking for the new US embassy in London is scheduled for 2013, with an expected completion date in 2017. The Times (London)

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US to build glass cube embassy in London, Rubik not impressed

Whipped Lightning: Alcoholic Whipped Cream

Alcohol and whippits in the same container? WHAT IS IT, MY BIRTHDAY?! (It’s not, but it actually is The Superficial Writer’s — HAPPY BIRTHDAY!) That’s right folks, Whipped Lightning brand Whipahol combines the creamy goodness of whipped spunk with the intoxicating effects of booze with the WAH-WAH-WAWESOMENESS of nitrous oxide . Jesus loves us after all! Now let’s all get naked, hold hands and sing Kumbaya (I dropped acid too just to be on the safe side). Official Site Thanks to Garrett, who knows you don’t need alcohol-infused whipped cream to the the life of a party. Just no pants and a lampshade on your head. Classic!

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Whipped Lightning: Alcoholic Whipped Cream

Old: Legend Of Zelda Dance-Fest Commercial

I remember seeing this video (the original Japanese commercial for The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past ) a long time ago, and you’re probably gonna yell at me because you sent it to me years ago, but you know what? I’m not gonna let it get to me. You can’t make me feel bad. But you can make me a sandwich. And you know what? YOU’RE GOING TO. Triangle cut, no crust, no pubes. Youtube via Zelda dance [wtfjapanseriously] Thanks to Spikey DaPikey and Dan, who actually perform that dance at clubs and impress all the womens.

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Old: Legend Of Zelda Dance-Fest Commercial

A Trophy You Can Eat: The Bacon Lombardi

Sure the Superbowl has come and gone, but the Saints beat the shit out of the Colts , did they not? WHO DAT?! It’s me, silly — the GW! That masterpiece of culinary greatness (and bacon) is called the Bacon Lombardi Trophy, or Bacombardi Trophy for short, and thanks to a great find from our friends over at BBQ Addicts blog, we now know what a Super Bowl trophy made entirely out of bacon looks like. According to their post, this monstrosity of bacon madness was created by Ben “Sweet Lou” Krout, and naturally, it was made for their recent Super Bowl party. All I can say after seeing the pictures is “Damn, that is beautiful.” Damn, that is beautiful. But what I want to know is what the actual armature is made of. Pound cake? Corn dogs? Because I could seriously f*** with some corn dogs right now. The Bacon Lombardi Trophy is God-Like [internationalfoul] Thanks to Doug, who once baked and ate a Stahamley Cup. GOAL!

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A Trophy You Can Eat: The Bacon Lombardi

Bioshock 2 Subject Delta Chainsaw Sculpture

This is a video of a guy carving the original Big Daddy prototype out of wood . With a chainsaw . Which brings up an interesting question: how do you carve Subject Delta out of a tree? Shave away everything that doesn’t look like a Big Daddy. HAHA! God I slay me. Youtube Thanks to rick, draw and jawn, who once carved a Big Sister out of granite and all copped feels.

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Bioshock 2 Subject Delta Chainsaw Sculpture

Funky Growin’ Up speakers are inspired by trees

Most speakers still come in boring rectangular boxes , so it’s refreshing to see designs that break the mold. Designer Marcos Ignacio Madia has given us few details about how the Growin’ Up speakers work, but they look like a modular design with woofer, midrange, and tweeter modules that you can stack and add to as your needs and budget grow. You can even experiment with different dispersion patterns, by either turning all of the drivers to the front, or rotating some to create a more omnidirectional sound. What’s not clear is whether the multi-driver unit in the gallery is a center channel or a surround speaker. Clearly, the Growin’ Up concept needs more development, but I think the funky look could work well in a contemporary home. Home Tone , via Coolest Gadgets

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Funky Growin’ Up speakers are inspired by trees

15-Year Old’s Impressive Stargate Diorama

This is 15-year old Sven Junga’s (awesome name!) Stargate diorama, including a LEGO Daedalus from Stargate Atlantis . It is most impressive, as are the other LEGO models in his Flickr gallery. And he’s only 15. I was still wearing Velcro shoes and licking the bus window! Hit the jump for several other shots of the ship, and be sure to check out Sven’s Flickr gallery for other LEGO mastery.

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15-Year Old’s Impressive Stargate Diorama

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